we used to be very close.
but sometimes, when the person that you are closed to,
suddenly break that chain of trust,
there is no way that you able to reconnect what it has been done.
Thursday, December 21, 2006
quotes: from h o z
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Rain.

我怀念有一年的夏天
一场大雨把你留在我身边
我看着你那被淋湿的脸
还有一片树叶贴在头发上面
那时我们被困在路边
世界不过是一个小小屋檐
你说如果雨一直下到明天
我们就厮守到永远
rain...
falling in my heart
你的声音仍然深印我心田
世界改变你也改变
我在海角天边
rain...
falling in my heart
你的诺言虽然没有实现
爱是雨点落在昨天
永不放晴的缠绵
*****
一场大雨把你留在我身边
我看着你那被淋湿的脸
还有一片树叶贴在头发上面
那时我们被困在路边
世界不过是一个小小屋檐
你说如果雨一直下到明天
我们就厮守到永远
rain...
falling in my heart
你的声音仍然深印我心田
世界改变你也改变
我在海角天边
rain...
falling in my heart
你的诺言虽然没有实现
爱是雨点落在昨天
永不放晴的缠绵
*****
has been raining for a few days.. BIG rain in fact. weather was great for sleeping especially last night. has been raining for like since the past 20 hour? had a great night and slept till 1 today. how long has it been since the last time i had the luxury of having such quality sleep? i cant remember..
actually, sometimes i am amazed too.. at how easily i can be happy and contented.. jus a good night of sleep while its raining can make me feel good... but then, a raining day always makes me moody... staring out of the window at the rain, it sets me thinking of alot of things. *contradictions..*
*****
where's our priority? i wonder where do us, friends, stand in some people's life. are some friends more important than others?
relooking some old posts of the past month and came across this that i have posted some time back. who would understand how i feel? again, i am not angry at anyone for the decision that they have made.. but thens there is also nothing i can do to control it also rite?
*****
christmas is coming in like 6 days?! that is very fast!!! last nite is the first christmas gathering of the year.. met up with M and S. well again, they over-pamper me with the esprit shirt they shared... thanks! i really like that shirt and its nice.. =) had the filling dinner and yuki yaki and then we walked around "promoting the growth of the singapore retail industry". haha!
anw, we love sam&kev/i.p.zone. i saw this checkered brown/green pants and the good point of it is even thou it is slim cut, it doesnt make me look short!!!!! woohoo~! sooo tempted to get it. trying it only made my desire to want to get it stronger. I WANT IT!!!!! but wells, most prob i might not be able to get it due to the damned constraints in my acc. sighs.
Too Busy for a friend
One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the
other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space
between each name.
Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about =
each of their classmates and write it down.
It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, =
and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.
That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student
on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had
said about that individual.
On Monday she gave each student his or her list.
Before long, the entire class was smiling.
"Really?" she heard whispered. "I never knew that I meant anything to =
anyone!" and, "I didn't know others liked me so much." were most of the =
comments.
No one ever mentioned those papers in class again.
She never knew if they discussed them after class with their parents, =
but it didn't matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose.
The students were happy with themselves and one another. That group of =
students moved on. Several years later, one of the students was killed =
in Vietnam and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student.
She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. He looked =
so handsome, so mature. The church was packed with his friends.
One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin.
The teacher was the last one to bless the coffin.
As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up =
to her.
"Were you Mark's math teacher?" he asked. She nodded: "yes."
Then he said: "Mark talked about you a lot."
After the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates went together to a =
luncheon. Mark's mother and father were there, obviously waiting to =
speak with his teacher.
"We want to show you something," his father said, taking a wallet out of =
his pocket. "They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you =
might recognize it."
Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook =
paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times.
The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which =
she had listed all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said =
about him.
"Thank you so much for doing that," Mark's mother said. "As you can see, =
Mark treasured it."
All of Mark's former classmates started to gather around. Charlie smiled =
rather sheepishly and said, "I still have my list. It's in the top =
drawer of my desk at home."
Chuck's wife said, "Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album."
"I have mine too," Marilyn said. "It's in my diary."
Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her purse and showed her =
frazzled list to the group. "I carry this with me at all times, " Vicki =
said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: "I think we all =
saved our lists."
That's when the teacher finally sat down and cried. She cried for Mark =
and for all his friends who would never see him again.
The density of people in society is so thick that we forget that life =
will end one day. And we don't know when that one day will be.
So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are
special and important.
Tell them, before it is too late..
One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the
other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space
between each name.
Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about =
each of their classmates and write it down.
It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, =
and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.
That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student
on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had
said about that individual.
On Monday she gave each student his or her list.
Before long, the entire class was smiling.
"Really?" she heard whispered. "I never knew that I meant anything to =
anyone!" and, "I didn't know others liked me so much." were most of the =
comments.
No one ever mentioned those papers in class again.
She never knew if they discussed them after class with their parents, =
but it didn't matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose.
The students were happy with themselves and one another. That group of =
students moved on. Several years later, one of the students was killed =
in Vietnam and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student.
She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. He looked =
so handsome, so mature. The church was packed with his friends.
One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin.
The teacher was the last one to bless the coffin.
As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up =
to her.
"Were you Mark's math teacher?" he asked. She nodded: "yes."
Then he said: "Mark talked about you a lot."
After the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates went together to a =
luncheon. Mark's mother and father were there, obviously waiting to =
speak with his teacher.
"We want to show you something," his father said, taking a wallet out of =
his pocket. "They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you =
might recognize it."
Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook =
paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times.
The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which =
she had listed all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said =
about him.
"Thank you so much for doing that," Mark's mother said. "As you can see, =
Mark treasured it."
All of Mark's former classmates started to gather around. Charlie smiled =
rather sheepishly and said, "I still have my list. It's in the top =
drawer of my desk at home."
Chuck's wife said, "Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album."
"I have mine too," Marilyn said. "It's in my diary."
Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her purse and showed her =
frazzled list to the group. "I carry this with me at all times, " Vicki =
said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: "I think we all =
saved our lists."
That's when the teacher finally sat down and cried. She cried for Mark =
and for all his friends who would never see him again.
The density of people in society is so thick that we forget that life =
will end one day. And we don't know when that one day will be.
So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are
special and important.
Tell them, before it is too late..
Disgusted
i was pretty disgusted by her attitude over the result.. acting innocent. trying to play ard with words. even saying things like "i think you learnt more" and "i think we have tried our best". oh pleeaase lo! i what you have done. i am happy that i got what i wanted. but nonetheless, but i am jus feeling my unworthyness that you got the same result as me cos u used something that does not belong to you in your report. but neverminds la. the world is never fair.
Sunday, December 17, 2006
call me shEn~!
Saturday, December 16, 2006
Friday, December 15, 2006
Finally.

at last! 我终于盼到了我在NYP的第一个A~~!!!
for my 3 years at nyp i had never gotten an A before.. not even at the modules that i have had confidence.. well this time round i really worked hard towards my goal: that is to learn as much as i can during my ipp, give everything i can and get what i want. of cos my stay there is really fruitful and alot of people to thank for me getting this gradE!!!
maybe i will drop by real soon back there to say hi sometimes next week. haha!
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
k lunch is...
not nice! i mean the food. haha. several lessons cancelled resulting in us going home and wanting to skip a lecture that 4 hours later. me and jx is walking out of the gate when i asked him: 向左走?向右走?immediately he know what i meant and proposed a movie but there is no shows that appealed to us. so we went k lo. sang to our hearts content~! but after that i syco him to come back to the lecture that is four hours later.. that proved not to be productive for us cos we didnt bring notes.. -_- flop la..
projs is pilling up
but well a temporary fullstop was put on today as we mark the coming of the term break and our temporary break off from all these work for a short while!
went to CMPB today for the ns check up. was supp to be 3 of us but gary got something on.. so its only me and binz. rushed there after the damned IMC presentation that went so wrong. i think i am going to flop it. hha. the check up was kinda fast except for the test i think to test our iq or wat. alot of assumption and maths qns. in total it was near to 3 hours spent and got to know two guys there.. they are from RP..
foto taking for the NS id card is a flow. cos we are told to "back comb" our hair, which landed my state of looking like some ah bengs from the 80s. '~'
i have decided not to go for the batam trip next week.. due to the change in date.. the new date crashes with the chalet. H keeps telling me its ok but i jus feel its not right i pang seh him at this stage. he specially planned for me and i jus leave to go batam. but still the trip is really tempting!!! serious speaking, i was very wanting to go. otherwise i wouldnt have wanted to go in the first place. but wells, since a promise is made, i cannot put aeroplane to H. so i am sure the chalet will be of equal quality! to the gang.. sorry.. i will join the next trip then!
went to CMPB today for the ns check up. was supp to be 3 of us but gary got something on.. so its only me and binz. rushed there after the damned IMC presentation that went so wrong. i think i am going to flop it. hha. the check up was kinda fast except for the test i think to test our iq or wat. alot of assumption and maths qns. in total it was near to 3 hours spent and got to know two guys there.. they are from RP..
foto taking for the NS id card is a flow. cos we are told to "back comb" our hair, which landed my state of looking like some ah bengs from the 80s. '~'
*****
i have decided not to go for the batam trip next week.. due to the change in date.. the new date crashes with the chalet. H keeps telling me its ok but i jus feel its not right i pang seh him at this stage. he specially planned for me and i jus leave to go batam. but still the trip is really tempting!!! serious speaking, i was very wanting to go. otherwise i wouldnt have wanted to go in the first place. but wells, since a promise is made, i cannot put aeroplane to H. so i am sure the chalet will be of equal quality! to the gang.. sorry.. i will join the next trip then!
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Gold Fish Memory
i hereby pronounce, i have gold fish's 3 sec memory.
i actually forgot that my ns checkup at cmpb is this wed! until binz reminded me.. and whats worsE? i have presentation for brenda lim on that morn!! that means i have to present first at 8 and then run off. cos my appointment is at 10. waraus! rush rush..
i actually forgot that my ns checkup at cmpb is this wed! until binz reminded me.. and whats worsE? i have presentation for brenda lim on that morn!! that means i have to present first at 8 and then run off. cos my appointment is at 10. waraus! rush rush..
Monday, December 11, 2006
Sunday, December 10, 2006
the star awards?
i think it has became like another "mediacorp's money spinning antics". are the awards going to the really deserving ones? i think quite flop lo.
they are creative in bringing it to stjamespowerhouse. but i dun think they are prepared to bring it there. seems like there were quite a few technical faults. and also the stage look miserably small, with seatings of the stars at shabbily looking chairs. but wells, maybe its still good that at least they tried to make it more "happening" by nakata's appearance.. hohoho!
anw, back to the deserving winners part, i am not trying to say who worked hard or not, nor am i going to say bad things bout anyone la. its just that i felt that it is a TV event. and getting so many people not into TV really doesnt make any sense. and with some supporters who jus votes blindly, how can we see the best? maybe thats y now all we see is the most popular.
with weilian getting new comer and top ten, i think its quite not fair for the others lo. WL has no intention to continue in TV. but the others do! i think getting this award is more impt for those who wanna be in the TV industry rite? i think those who voted has deprived someone else who’s more worthy of the Newcomer and Top 10 Awards in Star Awards 2006.
quoting dickson:
very true rite? but wells, thats something that we cant control:Behavior of others!
anyway, alot of peeps that i think shd get an award didnt get. the biggest regret i think is ann kok and patrica mok! ann shd have gotten the best actress! she is nominated for her role in love conceirge, my fav show of the year. best cast, good story, and the leads match each other well. but well, i dont know why not nominated in all the big awards. anw, its still my fav and ann did well!
pat mok i think also very ke lian. can act can host can do comedy. but then leh? 10 yrs liao still cant will top ten.
i sort of agree with dickson. that the so called "stars" nowadays are too "instant". and there is no solid back ground and foundation. see zoe. top star search but also a few yrs before she made it queen of calecott hill. that is why i like those shows thats SBC era, with all the veterans that really acted well. call me "orbit" or old fashion i dun care, but ask u a qn: which show nowadays can seriously leave a deep impression and u wud say its real good? and not say for a while only but years later? look at the kopi-o drama and a few others. no show surpassed them.
also, i feel like they have not "utilised" the foreign stars they invite. like those hong kong one. not even a interview or any performance by them. they wanna say a few words also keep interupted by that overun handsign. total disgrace. mavis hee come also din get her to perform any song. no wonder our local star award can never been able to be compared to what taiwan has. their jin zhong jiang for tv. walaoz! like a dunno what event like that. i wonder when we can elevate ourselves to that level..
they are creative in bringing it to stjamespowerhouse. but i dun think they are prepared to bring it there. seems like there were quite a few technical faults. and also the stage look miserably small, with seatings of the stars at shabbily looking chairs. but wells, maybe its still good that at least they tried to make it more "happening" by nakata's appearance.. hohoho!
anw, back to the deserving winners part, i am not trying to say who worked hard or not, nor am i going to say bad things bout anyone la. its just that i felt that it is a TV event. and getting so many people not into TV really doesnt make any sense. and with some supporters who jus votes blindly, how can we see the best? maybe thats y now all we see is the most popular.
with weilian getting new comer and top ten, i think its quite not fair for the others lo. WL has no intention to continue in TV. but the others do! i think getting this award is more impt for those who wanna be in the TV industry rite? i think those who voted has deprived someone else who’s more worthy of the Newcomer and Top 10 Awards in Star Awards 2006.
quoting dickson:
Stretching backwards to the Singapore Music Awards 2006, Chen Weilian did not received the Most Popular Singer (Singapore) Award. You all made up a big fuss about it and even requested for the votings to be revealed. What obnoxious and hideous fans, you are!
very true rite? but wells, thats something that we cant control:Behavior of others!
anyway, alot of peeps that i think shd get an award didnt get. the biggest regret i think is ann kok and patrica mok! ann shd have gotten the best actress! she is nominated for her role in love conceirge, my fav show of the year. best cast, good story, and the leads match each other well. but well, i dont know why not nominated in all the big awards. anw, its still my fav and ann did well!
pat mok i think also very ke lian. can act can host can do comedy. but then leh? 10 yrs liao still cant will top ten.
i sort of agree with dickson. that the so called "stars" nowadays are too "instant". and there is no solid back ground and foundation. see zoe. top star search but also a few yrs before she made it queen of calecott hill. that is why i like those shows thats SBC era, with all the veterans that really acted well. call me "orbit" or old fashion i dun care, but ask u a qn: which show nowadays can seriously leave a deep impression and u wud say its real good? and not say for a while only but years later? look at the kopi-o drama and a few others. no show surpassed them.
also, i feel like they have not "utilised" the foreign stars they invite. like those hong kong one. not even a interview or any performance by them. they wanna say a few words also keep interupted by that overun handsign. total disgrace. mavis hee come also din get her to perform any song. no wonder our local star award can never been able to be compared to what taiwan has. their jin zhong jiang for tv. walaoz! like a dunno what event like that. i wonder when we can elevate ourselves to that level..
Friday, December 08, 2006
now playing: 裘海正 - 爱我的人和我爱的人
盼不到我爱的人
我知道我愿意再等
疼不了爱我的人
片刻柔情它骗不了人
我不是无情的人
却将你伤的最深
我不忍我不能
别再认真忘了我的人
离不开我爱的人
我知道爱需要缘分
放不下爱我的人
因为了解他多么认真
为什么最真的心
碰不到最好的人
我不问我不能
拥在怀中直到他变冷
爱我的人为我痴心不悔
我却为我爱的人甘心一生伤悲
在乎的人始终不对
谁对谁不必虚伪
爱我的人为我付出一切
我却为我爱的人流泪狂乱心碎
爱与被爱同样受罪
为什么不懂拒绝痴情的包围
我知道我愿意再等
疼不了爱我的人
片刻柔情它骗不了人
我不是无情的人
却将你伤的最深
我不忍我不能
别再认真忘了我的人
离不开我爱的人
我知道爱需要缘分
放不下爱我的人
因为了解他多么认真
为什么最真的心
碰不到最好的人
我不问我不能
拥在怀中直到他变冷
爱我的人为我痴心不悔
我却为我爱的人甘心一生伤悲
在乎的人始终不对
谁对谁不必虚伪
爱我的人为我付出一切
我却为我爱的人流泪狂乱心碎
爱与被爱同样受罪
为什么不懂拒绝痴情的包围
Why?
Just back home from work not long ago. As expected, the news of my resignation had spreaded. JG is too small a company to keep any secrets. haha.
Suddenly, every one starts to treat me quite good. Their attitudes soften alot. I also found out that i have colleagues whom i have not really known them alot yet. and their warmness towards me make me feel like i shd stay... but i noe i shd not.. sigh.. why is the situation make me feel like staying only when i have decided, and will, go soon?
the world is sucha contradicting planet. i hate all these.
Suddenly, every one starts to treat me quite good. Their attitudes soften alot. I also found out that i have colleagues whom i have not really known them alot yet. and their warmness towards me make me feel like i shd stay... but i noe i shd not.. sigh.. why is the situation make me feel like staying only when i have decided, and will, go soon?
the world is sucha contradicting planet. i hate all these.
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
Monday, December 04, 2006
每一个人,都有自己的故事。遗憾的,坎坷的较多……
每一个人,都有自己的故事。遗憾的,坎坷的较多... 我们多数在朋友面前"装疯卖傻",不为什么,只是不想让别人担忧... 有些事情,也难以启齿...
保留,选择停留在心坎里,不是说有苦自己承担,朋友不愿分担,而是你我知道,有些“苦”,自己承受就好。
保留,选择停留在心坎里,不是说有苦自己承担,朋友不愿分担,而是你我知道,有些“苦”,自己承受就好。
the big R
i tendered today!
finally!
made up my mind to resign from THAT company.
they were nasty. coming up with reasons to shoo me away when they eat my 30 bucks voucher. well, i dun care that much anymore. there is nothing i can do if they purposely want to take away my benefits: the management will always come up with one after another reason to excuse themselves.
the main reason that spurred me to tender is cos of the christmas festive season. i go straight to the point, i was helping them when they have not enough people for hari raya and deepavali even thou i was having ipp. NOT EASY! imagine working like 6 am to 4 pm or 3 pm to 1 am. plus 2 hrs before and after for travelling? and i have my office hour ipp to look after also. and now all i am asking for is to take a rest on christmas and no one is willing to help. ask me to work on 24th, 25th, 31st and 1st. I IS ANGRY. part timers are not well paid and no benefits at all. and on top of that, people say alot of jiao weh of you. what for am i trying so hard to help when all these happen?
politics. happen all the time at anyplace. but its getting worse. a part timer shd not be involved in office politics but i am so badly affacted.
i used to love that place alot. the environment, the people, the food, the "freedom" we had there. it werent easy beinging in the service line but i think things had not been that bad there. we were a team and everything was well.. till the "改朝换代" incident happen. i dun wanna comment much but things just got worse. i am not the only one with this sentiment so i think the prob doesnt lie with me. working there has always been enjoyable but since then things had changed and every working day had became a torture. i tried not to be bothered by the system and other people but things are tough. i can stil maintain my high sale, my sales for yesterday was 1500. but the so stuck up system made me super uber tulan and i didnt even wanna move today to get more sales. whats the use? when u slog hard and people jus rip ur benefits away.
i dun even care what they wanna say of me anymore. continue to have more rumor of me and so be it. i cant be bothered as i am leaving. whats the use of wasting emotions on colleagues and company that does not even wanna acknowledge ur existance?
so so be it la. i am jus plain happy i left HELL. airport is still a nice place to work at, i must admit. i hope not with THIS company anymore. HAHA!
finally!
made up my mind to resign from THAT company.
they were nasty. coming up with reasons to shoo me away when they eat my 30 bucks voucher. well, i dun care that much anymore. there is nothing i can do if they purposely want to take away my benefits: the management will always come up with one after another reason to excuse themselves.
the main reason that spurred me to tender is cos of the christmas festive season. i go straight to the point, i was helping them when they have not enough people for hari raya and deepavali even thou i was having ipp. NOT EASY! imagine working like 6 am to 4 pm or 3 pm to 1 am. plus 2 hrs before and after for travelling? and i have my office hour ipp to look after also. and now all i am asking for is to take a rest on christmas and no one is willing to help. ask me to work on 24th, 25th, 31st and 1st. I IS ANGRY. part timers are not well paid and no benefits at all. and on top of that, people say alot of jiao weh of you. what for am i trying so hard to help when all these happen?
politics. happen all the time at anyplace. but its getting worse. a part timer shd not be involved in office politics but i am so badly affacted.
i used to love that place alot. the environment, the people, the food, the "freedom" we had there. it werent easy beinging in the service line but i think things had not been that bad there. we were a team and everything was well.. till the "改朝换代" incident happen. i dun wanna comment much but things just got worse. i am not the only one with this sentiment so i think the prob doesnt lie with me. working there has always been enjoyable but since then things had changed and every working day had became a torture. i tried not to be bothered by the system and other people but things are tough. i can stil maintain my high sale, my sales for yesterday was 1500. but the so stuck up system made me super uber tulan and i didnt even wanna move today to get more sales. whats the use? when u slog hard and people jus rip ur benefits away.
i dun even care what they wanna say of me anymore. continue to have more rumor of me and so be it. i cant be bothered as i am leaving. whats the use of wasting emotions on colleagues and company that does not even wanna acknowledge ur existance?
so so be it la. i am jus plain happy i left HELL. airport is still a nice place to work at, i must admit. i hope not with THIS company anymore. HAHA!
Friday, December 01, 2006
now playing: 周杰伦 - 退后
信誓旦旦给的承诺 全被时间扑了空
*****
tried calling you last nite, but no one picked up the phone. well maybe you were asleep.. or not free.. some sort i have gotten used to it ba..
*****
J was surprised to see me eating with Y today. she asked me if things are ok already. well, maybe i am the only one who thinks things are not right ba. maybe its jus his style that he treats "friends" like the way he is treating me..
*****
Not knowing is already bad enough, what's worse is not knowing what you don't know
this yongsheng hor. his msn nick is always meaningful in a way or other. be it serious stuff or sarcacism.
*****
i am very stressed, feel like stoning, absolutly no mood to embark on any of the projects. cant get myself moving and things are pilling up. have been stoning but havent do the tutorials and IB proj. seeing time ticking off is making me real guilty cos i noe things are not done yet but i jus cant get myself moving. i don't know what the hell is happening la.. bless me that i can find the kick to start real soon!!! otherwise i will be dead shit.
lastly, some pictures from wed. went out with hao, jx, joan, qq and siang. thanks qq for organising and thanks the company. suddenly feel like back to those old yr 1 days. haaa. fun shopping ard. bought a shirt at cK with hao. same color v nice. we will wear tog one day. haha. also shopped at the retro supermarket where there is a lot of retro stuff, tidbits and toys.
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