last day of the year 2005.. looking back at it.. its rather "fruitful"..

learnt alot..

learnt how to work with people.. (like them or not u have to..)

learn how not to ask too much from ur "friends".. (still doubting the real defination of friends)

learn how to tolerate the fugly faces of some (otherwise how to work with them?)

learn how to take things easier.. (it'll give u a hell outta ur life if u dun..)

learn how to do researches.. rcp-in.. issue out..

a lot more ba.. too many to be listed here.. all the best for the upcoming year..!

******************

you all a team.. a real team..
you all did things that i could never get u all to do..
but now without me, you all did all that.
we had fun, we had joy, but will they be back?

maybe i am getting further and further.. and further...

woo~ last working day in 2005.. so fast one more year has passed... still remember having some resolutions at year start but few has been fulfilled.. so i shall combine the undone ones with the new one for the next year. lol.

anw, has been a not bad week at IM. so, shall enjoy while i still can!

2 more days then january liao.. haha.. hope the new year will be a better one!

a nice song i wanna share...

**
Lost Good Things 童话破灭
who love my downfall

and it's just too cold

you show me true friend

baby i was so so

you might as well call me up physically

you know, you got me only into extremes

and i can't believe it

and don't know what to think

sometime around it was so love-sick

now it's so sick

cause they ain't doubt love

your hint is apart

and the day between us wasn't enough

and i know

i feel good time's come

i thought they stay, things are done

and become word-made

angels came but they left you day

had you slip awaylisten now burning empty

still this can't bebut even now we're not that happy

hotel motel it's hot in hell free from myself

but now left with no home

i want you to knowi never would have all

figure out that when you came now

it could have been forever

now it does bring me down

the high now the low up and down we go

put myself too close got burnt night tones

it feels like i'm sinking in the dead sea

don't we care the space inside us so empty

it's like it's over before be gone

this song is over now so was i want

ho ho ho.. merry christmas! this years christmas is kinda special cos its the first time i really celebrated it with friends... yesterday we went to lauren''s house! had fun but i was being bullied.. >.< lauren say i am not a guy. but sister to them... arrghh.. sigh. but the event is a great one! thanks evonne for organising.. and lauren for the venue.. kelvin, evonne, lauren, lip tat, serene, ser ser, debbie, shaune, eileen, maz, weihao was there at the great bonding session with plenty of food and games and vcd.. woohoo~!

after that we left at around evening and i headed down to my aunt's house for the family bbq every yr. great event nice food and alot of talking. then the presents also very nice.. hehe..

anw.. for the past week.. its alot of happenings in school.. once again i learnt how to work with peoples i dun like.. its really has been a learning journey here at tep. of cos other than this also learnt alot other things la haha. all i can say is team work and cooperation is important.. =) and i am glad that the groups o have been working with has been always quite bonded! like my ardc sicc team (ser ser, maz, jian an, jean), festive helpers (cheryl, yong hui, jessica, ms cai), finance (hasanah, cindy) everyone has been very kind to me even when there are times i made mistakes.. thanks for everything!

sigh. leopard just doesnt change it's spots.

today i heard it again. its THAT tone. that very tone.

obviously u think i wont be hearing it when we are at different place, but it so happened i heard it today ha. sorry HOR!

chey.. can't believe you are actually this thick skinned... but anw, its none of my business... i just purely hate it when two fones ring to the same melody.. and the melody is the fruit of my hard work. THANKS so much hor for fcuking up my day... muahahaha...

*~ don't step on my tail... you'll regret.. i wun even care who the fucking hell big shot you are or how rich you are.

january coming soon.. its always a month i always look forward too..

cos...







chinese new year is coming!!!

haa... cos got new clothes. got hong baos, got to see relatives whom i only see once a year..

alot of catching ups to do.. and its also nice to know every one is still well.. hee..

so that's it!

arr!! dunno why i always cant tag at my own board.. want to reply to my friend's notes also cant.. sigh.. shall do it here..

kk-evonne:
yea! we will rock lauren's house on 24 dec!!

kk-xuehui:
haha.. i also got the idea from serene's blog.. lol.. must call her shi fu..

kk-zb,kl,deb:
hello miss you all too remember the lunch gathering we have!!!

some of the farewell party fotos! hehe i TRIED to make them more funny.. but if it is not please tell me in my tag so nex time i dun do them.. haha

for a long time, i find that my classmates already dun care about my feelings liao... but after i came to ardc, i discovered that some of them still does..like ser ser.. still scared that i am angry.. i am so touched leh!! and kl, zb, and the rest of you.. you guys really made me forget about the other heartless ones.. haha.. cheers!

anw, now the heart charity is on. dunno why but nowadays i no longer like this kinda shows. first, i am utterly disgusted by the "very popular group in asia, world's heavenly group" that came to perform. excuse me lor please dont come out into the industry to play if you cant even sing live for a charity show. and its not the first time. dun really know how come so many fans support them. and it also makes me wonder whether the fans are fake ones, paid by the records company or their manager mr sun. *so happy ser ser shares the same thinking*

then the next segment that makes me wants to change channel is the segment on the muscle mans. dunno why mediacorp keep on putting this kinda performance despite so many in the public has find it so disturbing. issit got some physco people willing to pay u all alot to do it? siao ar. this time clip heavy things to their tigh and arms to lift heavy things. wahlao makes me want to puke. as if the artisists not human issit.. sigh.. think the needy also kek sim after they see ar...

tml, its going to be the start at IM, dun look forward to it. but life still has to go on.. like wads on ser ser's nick, I miss ARDC, but it's the time to say goodbye... everything in this world will go to an end.. even the nicest thing. but wads important is we cherish the good things that came out of it. to me, its the friends i made there and the happy memories i got.. i will keep them with me.. so cheers!

today its training for the new stop. i am so disappointed.. so sad.. everything feels so meaningless.. i will be far away from the others.. the trainings wasted alot of times waiting cos they are very busy.. so we jus wasted alot of time and finalli i finished my "san ge hao ren" with deb and serene. the briefing at LT is just as long winded and not interesting lor.. i dun understand why they noe no one is listening and still want to make it so long.. bout 2 hours hor.. then starving.. and also very cold.. like i say overall is just pure disappointment la so i shall not mention more liao..

14 dec. the very last day at ardc.

tml, i will be reporting to the ops instead of mr lee.

no more ma guo ren. no more lu ren. no more xin ren min.

no more puzzle fighter. no more crazy taxi with serene, debbie, zibin, kailing.

no more ardc foto taking.

no more shaker fries with evonne.



everything now seems so colourless to me...

i remembered a song by eason which suddenly i feel can represent the festive season now and my feeling. the lyrics is in chinese and must encode to unicode to see..


圣诞节
词:何启弘 曲:李峻一

我住的城巿从不下雪
记忆却堆满冷的感觉
思念的旺季霓虹扫过喧哗的街
把快乐赶得好远

*落单的恋人最怕过节
只能独自庆祝尽量喝醉
我爱过的人没有一个留在身边
寂寞它陪我过夜

#Merry Merry Christmas Lonely Lonely Christmas
想祝福不知该给谁
爱被我们打了死结

Lonely Lonely Christmas Merry Merry Christmas
写了卡片能寄给谁
心碎的像街上的纸屑

Repeat *
# 电话不接不要被人
发现我整夜都关在房间
狂欢的笑声听来像哀悼的音乐
眼眶的泪 温热冻结
望着电视里的无聊节目
瘫在沙发上变成没知觉的植物

Repeat #
#谁来陪我过这圣诞节

i think.. i am very brave.. cos...

i went to donate blood!! cant imagine how bloody scared and nervous i am k. since young i had phobia of needles and blood.. but this time lay yin gave me alot of courage and i went with her... woohoo~ three cheers for kelvin!!

i will upload the foto another time. dunno y sudden cant upload.. haha

yesterday, i discovered a very fun game. thou a bit late. haha.. crazy taxi..

this is my first score.

my best score so far.

serene's score.

thursday. day 4 of block leave. so sian.

nth much to do at home, rather than sleep and see how much fatter i've gotten. rena's friend says TEP got to eat alot and grow tall.. but all i am becoming is tall in the horizontal way.. sigh.. disappointment.

sorta miss ardc. everything in it. going to school with kl in the morn. chatting with mr lee. talking nonsense with ma guo ren and xin ren min. buying breakfast with rena. lunch with zb, jamie, kl and gang. xiu zhen and xue hui's cold joke and singing sessions. disturbing candise with chicken little.

2 more weeks and its going to end. nice times do flies.

finalli.. its been a long wait.. been so many months since i wanted to buy and now i finalli bought it!!! hooraayy!!!

~黑夜过后第一道阳光 是为了溶化你心里的霜

my left eye is swollen! its so painful.. sigh.. no peace for my health for the past month. had sore throat, migraine, and now theres swollen eye. sigh. sian.

last night, kailing sms me in the middle of the night for some help and i said ok.. and she actualli said "thanks!! will remember u forever de.." --forever. a word so familiar, yet brings so much pain.

once upon a time. 3 boys were cycling together in the night. soon, they were tired and they decided to take a rest. the 3 of them lay down at the bench, looking into the dark dark sky. one boy said: lets make a pact. we must be brothers forever! we are the best buddies forever!

but in the end.. i slowly lost the touch and bonding with you.. its a sad and painful process that i ever tot i would ever go thru. yet, it has happened. i dunno if there will be any improvement. or there would ever b.

but i will always remember that starry starry night..

went to the SBM day and watched the musical.. it was nice.. have my friend inside. haha. luckily i get to go. otherwise i dun think there would be once i can go to sbm day..

the musical was touching.. well at least for me. even thou i am not involved and it had nothing to do with me, someone in it has been greatly affected. i think his live will be changed. in the musical, his life long dream of being able to sing in front of pple who appreciates his singing is being realised. in the part when he sang solo, there is a moment i nearly cried, but of cos i din. cos to see some1 do what he realli wanted, that feeling can never be described. i noe he has enjoyed it.. he loved it.. i think that is enough liao.. anyway i also wont be able to share the joy and happiness with him. his happiness will be shared with his close buddies.. and sadly, i am no longer one of them. i noe they went out to celebrate after the event.

and i noe he will be happy.

thats enuff. =) whether i am there.. it doesnt realli matter anymore.. continue to pursue ur dreams..

~~PERSONAL SELLING~~

hello.. everyone help help support me hor.. i have to sell some things for a project at my attachment. if u all want contact me k? can use as christmas present too.. ur helps is very appreciated..

*famous amos cookies
120gm: $8.95
200gm: $9.13
210gm: $13.46
220gm: $12.56 (tin box)
550gm: $28.46 (tin box)

*foodedge gourmet
almond macaroons 300gm: $9.60
checkerboard butter 300gm: $8.80
cinnamon stars 300gm: $9.93
hazelnut crescent 300gm: $9.60
walnut shortbread 300gm: $8.40
plain butter 300gm: $8.00
choc almond butter 300gm: $8.80
christmas mixpack 300gm: $9.60

log cake blackforest/triple choc 500gm: $17.33
log cake fruit 400gm: $10.67

everyone helo support k.. pls contact me on wad u want in this two days.. haha thanks thanks alot i appreciate all ur help..

had a wonderful day today at ibrc! wif a lot of foto taking with ser ser, zibin, kailing and joyce.. lol.. here are some of them! *PS:i think we realli can be the nyp models! lol*

>serious discussion work














> our territory!














> d hard working guys!














> milo break!~














> advertise for milo..














> da hardworking nerds..














>working at ibrc

hello everyone. its "kelvin-clearing-his-name" time again! *haha hasnt had this segment for a long long time..*

1) last minute event
yes it is. it is only organised the day before it happened. and excuse me i said unorganised. not POORLY organised! i am not so nasty k?

2) all you ungrateful people
no i am not one. i smsed angi happy birthday early in the morn. we organised a sentosa trip to celerate. how ungrate am i can u explain?

3) on my birthday
ahhem. its you but not me who mentioned my birthday. remember? i said that u asked me "you also dont want to spend ur birthday alone rite?" i was just stating a fact - i was alone. wads wrong with this remark? i am not ironic. its you. cos u brought up this issue. i should be the one asking, wad has it got to do with my birthday?

4) selfish friend who jus take but not give
i have a clear conscience that i am at least not a bad friend. i turned up for my friend's birthday when i could! i wouldnt say i am always one, cos i am not a saint! we tried to organise a sentosa trip! please dont point finger at others, cos when you do that, 3 of ur other finger is pointed at urself.

5) Frisbee during TEP
hello.. its a school event. and i need to exercise mind you. Anw its really fun!

6) think of you being tired
only you can tired ar? please try to recall wad u say to me when i say i am tired k. we are all schooling people. every1 is tired. but we still made an effort to turn up! of cos i GOT think about u being tired cos i am! but anyone tot of me? when i fall sick that day?

7) repeatedly sms
i receive 1 sms and 1 fone call. thank you.

8) disappointing
so am i. i am the attitude one wad. i am the bad tempered one wad.
no diff. if you are so not disappointing y u cant turn up for the sat event? explain!!!

if there isnt this episode i wud b going to the sentosa event in the morning even when i have a wedding dinner to attend in the nite. no saying this to try to be the good guy but its realli wad i planned. herry is the witness.

*this entry is not wrote to blame anyone. i jus want to do some clarifying. not pushing blame or wad so ever!

"i can't believe you are not going."

thats all i heard after i told u i hurt my hand. u din even ask me if i was ok. u jus turned and walk away.

thats the reason i dont want to talk to you ok? regarding y i din talk to "d", please refer to my previous entry.

anw, on y i hurt my hand. i think i hurt during the frisbee game this afternoon. its a sort of games organised by sw peeps. and our group of ardc+bpos+mrc people got to play a game of frisbee. its the first time i play *gasp!* and its rather fun.. as usual like i play basketball i always panic when the ball/frisbee got into my hands.. as if they are bombs.. haha.. but the frisbee game this afternoon is realli fun i can say. hoped there is more but dun think so liao.. haha..

been a long time since i sweat.. and its really alot! loved the feeling.. realli missed it.. remember my sec school days when i wud still play bball with gary.. and also the daily jogging with bethia.. aw..

after sch went out to town for angi's birthday! got her a barney toy and a keychain with her name.. ate at friends @ cine..

now wat. i got pple telling me "if its ur birthday u also don't want to be alone rite?"

excuse me. fyi, i was sleeping at home for my birthday this yr. and you didnt sms to wish me. so to whoever said this, pls take note. u noe i hate it when pple like to criticise others but they didnt want to look at their own actions.

its not that i dont want to make it an event and be a selfish friend who just want to take but not give. but everything is so unorganised. when i on my way home after a hard day of tep and u want me to alight bus and go town? everything must organise mah. we are not the worm in each other;s body and we dont noe wad each other is thinking.

sigh.. so bad luck.. cos of watching a taiwan drama in school i got framed for "encoding it wih password that even the administrator cant delete it". siao. jus cos my admin number is there means i do one? excuse me lor.. the school system how sucks is evry1 know one lo. always ask me log out. then some one else come and do how i do my project? supply us with more computers la!

taken from zaobao.com written by one of my favourite authors. his articles often can make me feel the same.. dated 9 nov 05.

*to view please encode to unicode*

主动被动 ● 吴庆康

有时候约朋友会约到有点不是味道，不是有工作，就是在国外，要不然就是已经被别人约去。

最“气馁”的是，总是自己主动约人，朋友几乎从来没有约过我。

啊，为什么总是我那么主动，别人那么被动？是因为性格？还是因为习惯？是因为不觉得有需要？还是因为有别人更重要？

我不是计较，只是认为不论是朋友也好，亲戚也好，同事也好，只要是有“你和我”双方存在的一种关系，双方的交往应该是双向，而不是完全主动或完全被动的。

其实我已经很久很久没有因为朋友而发牢骚，不是没有牢骚，只是近年情绪稍微控制得好，学会了以更宽容更大量的态度对朋友，尤其是当自己也减少了花在朋友身上的时间以后，真的觉得没有谁会真正亏欠谁，一切都是自然而然发展，纵使有牢骚，也学着收起，然后淡忘。

但这不表示我对朋友已经没有要求，因为基本上我依然还是“我的朋友我的同学我最爱的一切”的那个人。

我需要的不只是那个当我的电脑出事马上会飞奔过来为我解决问题的朋友。我需要的也不只是那个只有在重大场合才会碰到面的朋友。我需要的更不是那个只有在我打电话发简讯过去后才来问我最近怎么样的朋友。

我觉得我需要的是一个时不时可以主动表示对我的关心的朋友，就像我常常主动问候朋友一样。这样的要求可能已经算很多，但事实上是，我对某些事情在某种程度上依然相当传统，还没有习惯只能通过网上日记的方式知道朋友的动向，了解朋友的心情。

因为很多事情还是需要看得见摸得到，而不仅是感觉得到而已。

我完全不介意全权主动表示对一些在乎的人的关心，但当对方从来没有主动过，时间一久，我难免会开始质疑自己的主动是否过分，别人是否需要，然后开始怀疑和猜测对方怎么想，考虑是否需要自我检讨，还别人一些空间。

这让我想起一些想得太多的人，在过年过节的时候，亲戚的关心问候往往会被视为八卦。而当这种情绪不断延续，以致有一天亲戚为了“避嫌”再也不主动的时候，另一方又开始猜测怎么别人那么久都不与自家联络，是不是对方不再关心，或是感情是否已经终结。我们是不是都想太多了，当我们主动表示关心，为什么不能够是真的关心？为何需要担心对方会否怀疑自己是否有不良动机？

原本很简单的事，有时候会因为这种主动被动的关系而变得复杂，而最遗憾的是，当你发觉了，认为需要弥补了，往往已经太迟。

当然，有些人天生被动，有些人坚决认为关心不需要挂在嘴边，只要常在心里头挂念，也就是有心。但如果在不需要花太多劲的情况下主动一下表现你的在乎，把关系变得更融洽，为什么不？

就算是做爱，也没有理由一个人永远主动，另一个人永远被动那么单向交通吧？

我承认我对友情仍然相当饥渴，不过当我主动到连自己都觉得饥渴得过分的时候，我会有种不如渴死算了的冲动。

Some lyrics that has made an impact to my life... meaningful words that have accompanied me thru happy and tough times..
*to c pls encode to unicode..*

~石康军 》 黑夜过后
曲:石康军词:李曈

我是说真的 你如果累了
别犹豫随时都 能来找我
我不善言 语但愿意陪你
让你至少不孤单 渡过难眠的夜晚
不管夜多漫长 天终究会明亮

黑夜过後第一道阳光 是为了融化你心中的霜
闹过哭过当力气全耗光 发现你不过又爱了一场

黑夜过後的另一个早上 是最後一次和他说晚安
你要相信你比想像勇敢 逃离夜的捆绑
奔向日出的方向(像夜会过天终究会再亮)

~洪俊扬 》 Guardian Angel
是否记得 守护天使的游戏
从我抽到你的卡片起
不再是一个人的回忆
或许未来有快乐也有艰辛
我会把你紧抱在怀里
永远不让你为爱哭泣

如果天空只剩最后一颗闪烁的星
我会让它为你照亮孤寂
让幸福为你指引
总有一天你会看到 guardian angel 降临

那是我的心一直在守护着你
天使它一定能够感应

thats all so far.. update soon..

some pics taked at ardc..

















huh? mei nu lehs! oh COOL.. peace!















dise and me.. after my hair cut..















dise.. me and ser ser..
















me and zibin.. latest boy band of 2005..
















me.. kai ling and zibin..

ooh i do love this jacket... sometimes back happen to c it at u2. cost 67. other places like heeren sell 100+. then when i went to hong kong rite i saw it at ard 40 only! but in the end i also din noe y i didnt buy it.. sigh.. now then regret... got quite a few colors.. like beige.. khakis color.. hope i can get hold of it soon!

TO THE CRAZY IDIOT WHO IS TOTALLY UNCOUTH, NO MANNERS THINK-BIG, ACT-BIG AND THINK-U-R-BIGSHOT BRAINLESS FREAK!

2 days ago i was uploading some tones to my fone and this GUY happen to pass by and heard me sending them to 2 of my frens. he wanted but i didnt reply..

1st: i am not that close to you.
2nd: since i am nt close y shd i send to you? dont act good friend can!

and after that i was away to make some call.. u actually snatched the fone from my fren and sent the tones to yourself even when others tell you not to open it cos of their personal items.. *FUCK!*

why do when others already tell you dont? and guess wat? after that he even say my fren.. "you very selfish leh we should share" goodness sake... pls lor still got the cheek to say this after u did such a thing! who wants to share with you? nobody say want k.. and u actually stole it yourself.. bu wen zi qu jiu shi tou! didnt know educated and RICH people will still do such things. =\ rich can bring into coffin isit? brag for all i care not like i beggar care about ur money or what lehs.. got so much money bring and throw and me la i help u burn next time can still use..

further more. are u trying to show off what you hafe gotten from me that i dont want to give you? u think u can use it as ur ringtone i will feel angry? sorry lor i dun waste my energy on this kinda of pig!

woo.. was surfing a blog when i saw this birthdaycake he gotten for his birthday.. bought from coffee bean.. choc one k my fav.. haha.. those noe how to do liao hor muahaha.. joking..

ar sian.. the past weekend has been playing mahjong with my grandma.. cos my aunt went to china and not enough pple.. so bo pian.. got a few times zi muo... also a few times animals bit plus zi muo... woo~ even thou at last lose 3 dollars oso happy.. haha..

recently i have been toking to angion quite alot of things.. i remembered i told her, friends are actualli like lover.. when ur lover leave you.. hurt you.. u feel sad and pain.. and so is it when ur friends do it to you! rite? in fact more hurt.. following is a lyrics i find v meaningful and it converys wad i want to say..

江美琪 - 朋友的朋友
词:姚谦 曲:何庆远

朋友的朋友
我们最后的定位
疏离的让自己
都好想流泪

朋友的朋友
我们最后的关连
隐藏好的伤悲
不想被你感觉

听见你名字
还有心跳的感觉
朋友不知情所以才没发现
经过多少年
伤痕才会看不见
寂寞的尊严也传到你那边

有时候以为
我能微笑去面对
有时心酸到
呼吸都听见

人总会难免
把回忆跟现实敷衍
因为人生对自己残忍了一点

*if u cant see pls encode it to unicode.. thnx..*

the real OCEAN

woo.. many days no blogg liao.. this week is a shaort week.. cos got two holiday.. at first today no want come sch de lo but then at home oso sian.. might as well come here tok tok.. play play..

tues went out wif angi and herry to chill lo.. ter at first coming too de but then got sth happen so din come.. so the three of us shop shop ard ps before we have our lunch and then after to esplanade to chill out..sit ard and took loads of fotos.. relaxing..

then yest went to grandma house... have to accompany ah ma play mahjong due to a short of khakis.. actualli its quite sian cos the tiles keep dun coming.. in the end i lose 7 bucks..

here's my horo for today.. seems interesting.. :
You could be in a position to offer someone forgiveness, Kelvin kho. Maybe someone in your personal life has acted selfishly, and the result was not exactly to your benefit. And although you can see the situation from the other person's point of view, the pain caused to you has been getting in the way of a reconciliation. But today suddenly all of this seems less important, and you no longer feel threatened. You realize that you can afford to be generous and to extend a trusting, compassionate energy.

so bored.. today's time passed extremely slow.. i think its cos of the holiday tml... jus now felt cold and hungry.. and eve say like i am in hell.. hahaa.. so i went to get a friend rice from cheers lo.. sian later dinner no appetite then die.. mum going to skin me alive. haha

happy deepavali!!

the same old question is back again...

again i asked myself whether i have personality problems.. so much so that i cant mix ard with pple normally.. people cant get me involved in their activities.. i cant break into their cliques.. i can say i let go all these liao.. dun really feel angry or wad.. but who wun be sad? i mean a tiny little bit is for sure la.. imagine the whole group pple go out but i am not called to go.. but its realli ok.. like i say.. the society is very realistic and cruel one.. anyway nowadays i can handle these problems more better liao.. so dun worry shan and herry!~

today is the second day i am on time... in this 11 days... hhaha.. and rena wore her sec school uniform here! she said its halloween... haha crazy gal... but its fun to have this kinda activities la.. she is wearing malay costume on wed.. so enthu hor haha.. for me is too sian no one company.. otherwise i wud do so too...

i realli feel very sux.. i realli hoped to have someone to talk to.. but too bad i dun have friends who live near me and willing to come out in the middle of the nite to talk to me.. sigh.. maybe i realli have personality problems..

i was just wondering why i cant find so many pple on fri nite... so it turned out to be everyone is at ur party.. haha..

happy belated birthday chang da~

Quote of the day:

"Jokes are exaggerated truths"

saw it on today's urban.. how true.. isnt it? it said by rowan atkinson, the guy who acted as mr bean..

the rope snapped. our rope snapped.

but no one wants to savage it. i cant be the one doing it that often. get it? not that i want to let go. i am just tired.

cya. tep very boring..

Oh my gosh~!!

I happen to browse thru zaobao.com and i saw this taiwan article that reveals the real face of Ocean Ou!!!

He is fat! and like ser ser said.. married with 2 kids..

total not the way i tot he wud b luking like... i tot at least not handsome also quite young.. but anyway i will still support him la.. his voice good...

If u r curious u might want to go here -> http://stars.zaobao.com/pages2/ocean051014.html

took some nice pics at IBRC..

HAHA!

it feels so funny to c some1 talk bout betraying of trust.. in the first place think lor.. have u not betrayed anyone's trust? really?

actually i just cant b bothered.. jus feel ridiculous. lolz...

Fun personality test! courtesy of http://haleonline.com/psychtest/ from amanda's blog..

You're an ISFP

ISFP
You're gentle and compassionate...open and flexible...considerate of others and do not for views and opinions on them. Often focus on meeting others needs...pleasant, quiet and kind....at their best ensuring others well-being. Caring and sensitive....modest and reserved..
OK...you enjoy subjects that relate to helping and knowing about people... art ... computers and history classes if these classes are taught with an applied, sensible approach.. and if objectives relate directly to everyday lives....
You're somewhat artistic, aren't you? You could probably post a great poem on the Storm Palace, huh? You dislike structure, because it takes away from your spontaneity and freedom. You like leisure, and seek it out. You savor it...probably say "stop and smell the roses"...You have a personal and humorous approach that is unique...
Patient and flexible..easy to get along with and no need to dominate others. You don't need to lead, and are a loyal follower...good team members... You're trusting and understanding...
Love to you is utter devotion and loyalty... when you first fall in love, you may feel consumed by it...."falling in love with love" ...focus on the romance of it all..you are constantly nourishing the relationship... When scorned, you probably retreat and repeatedly analyze the situation internally....When you let go finally, you can be more assertive again...
You organize things according to their personal and humanistic values. You like a work setting that contains cooperative people... leadership style involves personal loyalty as a means of motivating others... prefer team approach...likes to enjoy life...
Be careful of the following: you can lose out when you neglect your own needs. because you see others' needs so clearly, and because you're heavily motivated toward meeting others' needs, you may overlook your own requirements. You need to learn how to respect own needs more and to be assertive and direct with others in asking for their help and for time to take care of themselves.
You also lose out when you are afraid of conflict and mismanage it as a result. You take personal responsibility for conflicts and issues that in actuality belong to others. You become hurt and withdraw. Finally, you can lose out when you become self-critical, and do not appreciate your own accomplishments.

ISFP: "I Seek Fun & Pleasure"

one week into tep! has been surviving very well.. except the client project has left us quite unsure to do alot of things cos its the first time we are invoved in such things.. has been calling clients.. faxing letters to them..

also made some friends.. its pretty fun up here.. very different from classical lessons we have.. althou we "eat snake" alot.. haha

out of this 5 days.. wed is the only day i am ontime.. 10 mins early.. others all late.. sigh.. must improve this problem sia..

ok.. i still feel sad when i found out that some peeps went out and din call me...

T_T

second day of tep.. now in ardc room.. verys sian!!!

First day of a new term!!

now i am in the ardc room.. we just completed part of the assignment given to us. its pretty fun over here.. making new friends and sorts. its so sian! this morning the teacher is like talking and talking ntil i fall asleep.. then realli like lijuan say lidat lor slack slack slack..

anw, went over to visit terence at cheers too.. well all i can say is cheer up buddy.. u will get used to it.. hahaha..

ok.. this week quite ok la.. mon went to jb with ser ser, mingsiang, weihao, kang an and junxiong. bought some things and caught a movie "sky high". comedy like fantastic 4 and i dun think its shown in singapore yet. overall quite fun, but after that there is some arguements with my father, which developed into a major dispute last night.

wed there is the tep orientation. super bored and bo liao.

hope sch starts soon.. so that i can be more bz and there will be less nonsense in my life..

*why must my life be so shitty!

"it's strange how often things turn out for the best even when you think that nothing could make it right. sometimes it's not a matter of whether you can or cannot fix a situation. cuz very often you can't. in those times, it's just learning how to work around the problem."

super inspiring quote from bong's blog.. here to share..

home from the tep orientation.

not much emotions. sad to noe i cant go events cos i am quite interested in that..

saw someone. we were suppose to be best friends. but now i din even talk much to him. din even talk directly to him. i dun feel sad; angry; happy. no emotions at all. may be thats what some pple say when ur heart is already dead. all u feel is just meer someone you noe. so many things has happened in this short time frame of abt 1 and 1/2 yrs we have known each other.. and alot if things is always accumulated one.. whether is it anger, happiness.. maybe that time will be the last time u wud say i like to put words into ur mouth.

but i will still like to thank you for the happy memories.

maybe one day we can be good friends back.. i don't know.. like i say maybe..

SH says:
hey..
i really wanna talk but i've gotta study or i'm gonna waste my parent's money

so not him right? haha.. he's the kind like play play like me de.. peicai pple might noe hu i am toking..

jia you in australia! we will al jia you together.. friends no matter where u r..

so long liao! my com spoil so long liao so blogged less.. haha..

just spent 3 days without my hp cos i sent it for servicing.. so uncomfortable lol.. aniwae, a few days ago i went out with gary.. went to watch shen hua, which is a marvelous show thou i dun like the ending.. haha.. after that we went shopping ard before going to cartel for dinner.. yummy..

well.. school going to start soon.. i am so happy i can go back to sch from nex week onwards le.. this holiday alot of thing happened.. but now i dun want to tok about it anymore.. i duno if later i say liao pple might say i put words and things into their mouth.. wads the use? sometimes i feel when u want to say others.. pls c urself first.. if u want to say those things about me, its ok with me now le.. its not that i am petty, but i just dun want to put up a fake face in my life anymore.. its very tong ku..

havent blogged for a long time. alot of things happened.. i am disappointed in many things. maybe after all.. its all my faults... I AM JUS SOMEONE NOT EASY TO HANG OUT WIF!

ShenZhen: Window of the world
Joan, KK, Darren, KA, WH, QQ, Mingsiang


KK, WH, JX, QQ, KA, Darren, Joan, Mingsiang


Snow City: Joan, Mingsiang, KK, JX, WH, QQ, Eugene


Beautiful Night Scenery of HK from The Peak!

*~遺忘過去~*

對生命你不必存有懷疑　人生它本來像一齣戲
故事的結局是悲是喜　自己總會有些決定

看朝陽又帶著希望升起　歲月的腳步從來不停息
等到那歲月走進你夢裡　生活變得更美麗

工作上有多少不如意　讓明天去好好忘記
道路總有許多不平的遭遇
化做點點滴滴把它全部遺忘在回憶裡

我忘不掉心碎的過去　可是我必須面對我自己
生存還靠自己去努力　我不再猶豫

我揮不去昨日的戀情　可是我必須面對我自己
未來生命該用什麼代替　告自己爭取

霓虹燈裡埋藏了幾許　叫人們迷失自己的騙局
泡杯咖啡請聽我告訴你
泡杯咖啡請聽我告訴你

THE MAID. wanted to watch sia...

i shall c hu HAVEN'T c yet can c with me.

happens to c this post for emma's blog and share with u all..:

"hM.. think about this.

you wake up in the morning, get ready to leave for school,
and you -
wait for the lift,
while inside the lift, you -
wait for it to get you to the ground floor.
then you head for the bus stop/ mrt station, and you -
wait for the bus/train to arrive.
then you board d bus/train, and you -
wait for it to take you to your destination.
upon arrival of school, you -
wait for class to start,
wait for your lecturer.
then during class, you -
wait for lesson to be over.
then luchtime, you -
wait for your seats,
wait for your friend,
wait for your food.

and then you go home,
wait for the bus/mrt,
wait for it take you to your destination.
you reach liao, walked to your blk, and you -
wait for the lift.
and it go on and on..

isnt life all about w-a-i-t-i-n-g ?
just like in the movie " The Terminal " ?

right now at this point,
we are waiting for many things.
waiting to finish our studies,
waiting to get a job,
waiting to be a real adult,
waiting to taste like what's life out there,
waiting for a lisense,
waiting to get our first million..
and the list go on and on.

we all have 24 hour per day.
minus the 8 hour for sleeping, (for normal life)
that leaves 16 hours.
16 hours, minus the time for school,
say 6 hour,
that leaves 10 hours.
10 hours. hm.
this 10 hours include :
- eating (well, if u're a fast eater, gd for u )
- bathing
- transport time
- preparing for sch
- waiting time
- meething up with your friends 4 movies etc..

that leaves how many hours a day ?

Life is soo short, isn't it ?

well if you feel panic now,
here is a nice poem for you and to end off with.

** drum roll **

Every morning is a new beginning
Everyday under the sun is a gift from God
Welcome and challenge each new day with Faith and Hope
Enjoy yourself in good and easy days
Challenge yourself in bad and difficult days
No matter what day it is, Thank God.
Treasure each day as if it were the evening of the very Last Day. =.)

if i were to die tomorrow,
i just wanna say,
I LOVE YOU ALL.
thanks for every one and each of you who are reading this.
thanks for your presence.
you add colours to my life."

AaaArrrarRgggHHHhh!!! how can jun yang be out of the competition!!! i cannot accept this fact.... for he sings so well.. even at the final night i feels that he really sang well.. tong hua has never sounded so nice leh! i mean its not that i think wei lian is not good but in this competition i feel jun yang is better.. to the end of the competition this feeling is even bigger.. argh feel so bad for him!!!

maybe people all has a liking for wonderful things. in this case, a wonderful voice. people loss too many nice things. thats y when u r losing one, u are angry, cos u duno when another "thing" of a similar standard will come. haha u all got wad i mean?

maybe this kind of competition is not so bad after all huh.. even thou the advertistments can get real annoying sometimes when they come out too often... but it helps discover talents... and we can enjoy some nice singing too!

well btw holiday has started for ur info! and i faild my advance theory! hahas.. nvm.. its jus first attempt... i think there many people out there too who just cant get it right on the first time.. hmmm holiday started since last fri and its so terrible!!! really nothing to do and time is passing so slow!!! cant get a job due to the hk trip.. cos the timing is too near... sigh.. shall just try to spend my time meaningfully!!!

Following is an excrapt from jun xiong's blog... i am in too distraught and angry state to talk about this topic now..

"This project superstar competition is totally out of point! ok, lets talk about kelvin.. For viewers' info, kelvin is a handicapped person with visual problem. okey, i have totally no objection with handicapped people.. yes, everyone has the right to do the same thing. BUT, this is a SUPERSTAR competition.. superstar means: look, x-factor, talent. 3 basic things a superstar shld have.. i mean who also can see that JunYang is way better in all 3 basic... just don't get it, why did they let kelvin in, and mislooked the talented one... totally not fair!! this competition is a total BULLSHIT! issit because kelvin can help them earn more money thru votes/sms?? haiz~~ typical money makers... never spare a thought for the contestants.. who also can see junyang's score yest was ultra high.. and kelvin's was so low.. yet, got kicked out... "

my feelings is aboslutely the same as yours chua... arrrhhhggg!!!!!

some pictures from previous presentation..




me and "4 duo hua" plus Jess.. lolz..




the cool....





KK n KA n SAM

today i had my second paper.. law.. bloody hell lor.. the medicine is making me unable to focus. head cracking pain like hell... alot of things i remembered cant come out.. shits lah!! !#$^)(*&^%$#!@#$%">*&^%$#!@#$%

rena says: kk chill lahs..wad's over is over..just concentrate on yer next paper..moreover u sick so must take care kaes? hahas..drink more water..and eat more fruits to get well soon..hehes..kaes..rena out..=]

sigh.. still my daughter better.. right now saying encouraging words to me.. haha..

ok.. nw is my turn le.. finalli!!

dise says.. u deserve it.. muahaha.. kiddinn la.. tk it easi la.. and rena is rite!! it's over le.. we shld try to look forward instead of lookin back.. dun b like me k.. ani wae.. lucks fer the rest of ur paper.. study hard k.. dun let regrets live in u.. buaizzzz...

rena says: yea..one last thing before i go..lols..candise ar..u type so slowWwWw~!!!! lols..byebye..

ok thanks for all the encouragements.. hehe.. cya!

i am lost

i think i hurt someone

and in turn i hurt myself.

i am afraid.

wad if one day u ignored me completely?

things shouldnt end in this way..

its the worse fireworks i have ever seen..

i dont want to be like rena, in a situation where fireworks can only bring up bad memories..

its supposed to be joyous

wad i am saying is not what you thought i meant.. ni zhi dao ma?

i hope you does.. cos i cant afford to lose anymore friends..

I am so sorry... This time its really my fault.. I admit le… I really found out wad happened Liao... And it’s really my fault... Sorry minzhen for my insensitive acts. I shouldn’t have done that. You are right in your blog. I noe now that I have done it nothing I do can help... But I just wana say that I am sorry.. Even if you don’t forgive me I will accept it cos I was in the wrong for the first place. I just hope that u will noe my apologies. Please I don’t want to lose a friend like you and ser ser k? Not sure if u read my blog... But I really hope u will see this. I really feel guilty for making u feel so like that when u tried to make effort for me to have be able to blend into u all... it is all my negligence to your feelings…

for duno wad reason i am super depressed today.. nothing seems to be ok for me ever since i woke up this morn.. was like got the "bang my head against the wall" feeling.. help.. why of all time.. now.. when exam is just one week away..

arent this suppose to happen to girls only?? die.. maybe people do get mood swings, regardless of their sex.

kelvin u must recover quickly ok?

anw, last sat i went to see the z pop concert at suntec.. nice lor so many artists.. but the duration is like close to 7 hour.. abit cannot tahan.. lol.. but there certainly has my favs! Jones shi, JJ, A Mei and others.. so happy that i can hear Jones sing live again. and JJ, his voice soo damn good lor..

hmm but half way i ran over to esplanade to catch the fireworks.. think there is some rehearsal for ndp? well its so nice this yr.. i was standing at esplanade there and there is fireworks on the bridge on the right of me, and on the sea on my left.. such a nice view..

so after that i just walk back to the concert lor.. i cant believe i am enjoying myself to this extend when the exams are so near.. lol..

最近老妈狂追韩剧《黄色手帕》，今天提早放学，“没办法”的情形下也看了一集。故事不是很好，好像专为气死观众而写的，但女主角的其中一句话非常有意思。

人世间要是没那么多杂事，那就是天堂了。

说得没错。要是人世间多一点点爱与关怀，少点猜忌与怀疑，或许就不会有那么多战争，女佣杀雇主、包装员杀女童、前夫杀前妻、学生自杀。。。

但现实生活就不是那么美好的，要不然这就是天堂了。。

"if u are tryin so hard n still they dun wanna ask u out or sumthing then i guess they r nt worth bahs"

i dunno if its right of me to try so hard ust to get that little acceptance.. is that real acceptance? i duno.. and i dun think so.. maybe they will accept.. cos i tried hard enuff or out of pity? thats not true friendship..

i just hope everything will turn out fine...

happen to talk to the topic of fotos with mabel.. and i was saying we all grow old.. and the fotos will bring back memories.. and to cherish the long friendship in the fotos so as not to lose them..

since i went out with her yesterday, have been feeling quite blue. not that the outing is not fun, its damn fun. and thats why making me blue today. after the happy feeling we had.. i start to think today, why i cant feel so happy everyday? is like i only feel so happy with good friends.. and sadly i can only meet them once in a while.. like 2 months or so.. in class.. herry and jess always mia.. then jun xiong is with kang an.. sam has to work.. left with the rest which i cant realli break into.. i mean i was close to pple like weihao, qq, jingfa and chang da.. but since when we drifted really apart. i don't noe why. there has been a few times they went out without calling me.. going for the movie we wanted to watch together themselves.. forming their small cliques.. i feel ostracised.. cant help but realli did.. i mean even felt far with weihao, who i shouldnt as we known from yr1.. i realli don understand. i mean sometimes i think back is it something i had done? and sometimes it landed myself to be really frustrated.. i dont wanted to but i jus cant be as natural and unrestrained like jx.. all these small things realli make me frustrated.. i am not angry at anyone.. but just i am frustrated.. with myself..

"你懂我吗?"

偶然在朋友“A” 的博克里看到这段话。当然也不禁开始问我自己同样的问题。有多少人懂我？

而我希望懂我的人，他懂我吗？

不知道。。也没有想过要去知道，可能是因为人本能逃避的心理吧。

最近好烦阿！考试时间表总算出来了。。就在三个星期后！真不敢相信时间是过得如此的快，这个考试一过我的yr 2 就过了一半了。然后毕业，当兵，再读书，找工作，结婚。。。有时真的不知道人生为什么一定要这样。这么stereotype. 我想做一些不一样的东西。。最近真的开始后悔当初没有坚持己见，而是乖乖听话的读商科。读理工学院真的是要读个自己有兴趣的科目。要不然真的很痛苦。当然现在都已经第二年了，说要换的话也已太迟，在此只好奉劝大家要好好做出选择，不要做会让自己后悔的事。虽然现在的成绩也渐渐上了跑道，但现在在这里，日子真的很不好过，这么多我不喜欢的module 缠着我，这么多的“人事纷争”，让我快要窒息。真的很希望能回到过去“单纯”的日子，老师会听你谈心事，帮助你，但你都知道他们不是只为工作，而是真的帮助我们。。同学们快快乐乐，和睦相处。没有虚伪，没有人会在后面插你一刀。

但是。。有可能吗？

流逝的时光是一去不返的。

我学会了不要那么在意一些事，不要让一些人影响我的情绪，心情。有时，握紧的手要放开，我们才能得到更多的东西。最近的一些事，也让我发现，很多事情都是双方面的。若只是我一个人在努力，这段友情是不可能可以work out 的。

突然好怀念从前。。有铠汶，慧云，月贵，慧珊，芝玮，碧云，lay yin, bethia 等着班好友的支持与鼓励；曾老师的教诲与鼓励。。

i'm tired. i find myself thinking too much of alot of thing.. mind too much of things. some things actually its ok if i don't have it, but i still brood over it.. jx have higher EQ than me.. the fact he can say "its ok not big deal", i find him much more succesful than me.

i mean, i cant really handle my emotions and thinking so well.. i gave some things too much weightage in my mind, even when they shouldn't be. maybe its cos i see friend as too important a topic.. even to the extend of to those who dun really take me that close as a friends.. but well i must learn from jx.. i still have him.. mm.. my sec sch buddies.. :)

some times i don't noe why you noe.. maybe true friends are hard to find.. maybe the saying "you can be class mates but not necessary friends" is right.. i can't help but feel it sometimes.. why leh? sometimes i see some pple.. i think they got attitude problem but then they can still find good friends.. then i start to think back.. issit cos i got attitude? worse attitude in fact? i mean its not that i like to judge pple. but it is bound to have pple that u might not like lor..

nowadays i don't noe wads the right thinking i should have.

well the pass few days had been quite enjoyable cos my aunt and uncle booked a chalet for the family! lol.. its not that king like downtown east but the bungalow type at changi! ours is the one in front of old changi hospital.. lolx.. din went down on the first day cos of lesson... so i went on the second day which is sat. had bbq and sorts of chalet activities.. and so is the next day.. overall its really fun! been yrs since we had this.. remembered when i was really young and we would make at effort to have at least once every yr.. those were the days lor.. that will never come back.. haha.. and i went up to the old changi hospital.. din went in cos there is dogs.. but just stood outside there see see lor.. was so famous.. abit wasted if i din visit when i was here.. lol.. and tell u wad the damned dog chased us! my cousin was like running but i pulled her.. cos if we were to run the dog will chase rite.. so we waited for a while with the dog next to us.. then slowly walk back... argghhh was her scream... lol... fun lor haha..


famous OCH

i saw david beckham!!! yes its the soccer superstar... not sure wad he is here for but he come to my school yesterday.. and there is like so many pple crowding at level 1,2,3,4.. just for a glimpse of him lol... and those stupid security and manager make us go back and back till we are like 6-8m away.. sianz.. i mean like we are not going to flock and just run towards him rite.. just let us stay closer to see mah.. might as well dont organise then no need scared us crowd lor. rite?

anyway.. got to see the REAL him.. haha.. and yea he is tall and handsome.. not so bad after all.. its like a real chance.. got to see free of charge.. some pple have to like pay a lot to see.. well i think thats the privileges we have as students.. hehe.


Beck is the guy in white

well maybe having the IOC in singapore isnt so bad after all.. bring in money.. bring in stars lol.. last night wad rather tired and dont want to study.. so i went down to esplanade alone.. some quality time alone. at the same time oso try my luck to see if there is fireworks for the opening of IOC. was like walking from there to merlion and back.. sitting down occasionally.. enjoying the breeze.. and yes my luck came when the firework starts at 2115hrs. that is like 1 hr 45 min after i reach here.. but like i said its so nice here to just relax so i wouldnt mind if there is no fireworks after all.. shall come here more often..


Din manage to get any pic of the fireworks but here is a nice pic of the beautiful landscape.

some people just cant be more mature.. i cant believe this happened!

why must you be probing into matters of others?
why must you look at someone's else's things?
why must you "announce" it out to everyone present?
why must you make fun out of it?
why must you tease?
is it any of your business?

just f**k off k.. for your info you are not really well liked by many.. and not many can tolerate your actions. personally it is not the first time i see you do this kind of thing. please change and be more mature.. please get a life! if this is what you are continueing to be i am really feeling very sorry for you.

past week has been enriching.. tues have jones concert, wed have initial d with junxiong, terence and mingxiang (thanks to alot who "forgot" us due to "miscommunication"), thurs have war of the worlds (very nice too and i may start to love waching movie alone.. special thanks to gary for your company). today went to grand hyatt for buffet! lolx. the straits kitchen is serving very nice food... i love the char kway tiao and fried rice. haha.. hmm.. next time it will be another choice for me to makan..

as for the previous movies, initial d isnt so bad. nice afterall.

war of the world, angry at first cos none wana acc me.. so for those who wana noe more.. sorry.. but the time is great with gary... cheers!

went to Jones Shi's concert today.. tickets compliments of QQ.. kinda nice hearing him sing.. he was spotted in a karaoke club.. cool ah... he got real talent!! realli great voice lor.. at first i oso listen 2 of his song only.. but now after listening to him live i think he is realli good.. going to get his album lol.. :D ohoh, we're very lucky! met rena, ariel, huien n rena's fren from np.. rena n ariel got no tix, so we chatted wif them ouside.. after which we went in together.. and both of them somehow got the tix la.. haha.. so lucky.. we're the last to get inside the place, but we got the front row seats.. =) isn't that so great! last to get in, but got the best sit.. some more right infront.. then loy helped us to get posters and i got his autograph and shake hands! lol.. yea~~~ lucky lucky.. then went eat at mac, den headed hm lor.. tts all ... cool day in school.. next time shall join this kinda event if there is anymore.. lol..

went back wif ka n adi..waited for adi... den saw jiaxin gang..so we chitchatted quite some lame stuff..den they wanted to walk outside, so we the guys waited to see if the guards will chase them..coz not everytime can walk outside..so yea, we waited.. and yes, they got chased back to take the escalator...

haha...=D

wooo~ one week passed and i have not blogged.. haha.. today school start liao.. nice to see all back here. and its... CHUA JUN XIONG'S BIRTHDAY!!! hapi bdae to u, hapi bdae 2 u, hapi bdae to cjx, hapi birthday to you!!!!!

haha.. happy not.. one whole entry for you lor.. and today i am late for school to pick ur cake touched ba! smilez k.. dun so sad anymore le.. next yr ur dream will come true de!

well.. last day of holiday liao.. alot of events yest and today.

went out with mabel and george yest. was supposed to meet them after the sign language course but it ended early! so i have to wait for them for bout an hour.. meanwhile i went over to padang there to kaypo at the ndp rehearsals.. haha.. saw some march pass and sort.. sigh still struggling between sign language and ndp.. lolx..

and guess wat.. we din manage to get the tic for initial d.. T_T
too bad.. have to go k box after makan.. and as usual it was sooo much fun with u 2.. :)

today is my cousin one y.o. bdae.. oso go lor.. sort of like quite awkward cos not really alot of pple i noe.. but then just eat eat lor.. play play with baby lor.. haha..

smile! cos school starting! (siao_*)

in amidst of the legendary 2 weeks holiday.. one that everyone envies but isnt realli that nice. i mean whats the use of having it when there is 3 ica waiting to be completed during this period? but then thinking back havent really did a lot too..

well some big happenings for the time was i went to a short tour at a neighbouring island to recharge.. and now i am so energised! sometimes realli need to get some quality rest. other than that the sleeps that i have been getting is so yummy... have to get back those that i have been losing due to school and ica mah.. haha.

ok.. have fun peeps.. cya tml for the NE seminar.. sian! middle of holiday still got seminar.. arrgghhhs!!!!

happy birthday to you!

gillian's birthday today.. hope her wish can come true and she excels for her A lvls.. well now 18 liao 1/2 adults liao cannot so ren xing liao lor..

i will remember our pact.

"LOL.... i already make sure no one know my birthday... those who know keep quiet hor.... haha....Now I am slackling at the lab again... very tired.... k la gtg bye bye"

dear mr kang an, please check your previous blog on "Your Birthdate: January 17"..

Muahahaha...

went to watch "Mr n Mrs Smith" with my parents and sis.. its nice.. worth the ticket.. hehe..

there will be 2 week of holiday from now on.

yay.

nothing can describe how i feel.

oh my god! finally completed the idiotic Finance ICA!!!!! its SO EASY man....

oohs today i went to far east to cut my hair.. first time so i have to trouble weihao to bring me there.. haha.. thanks dude! for coming even when you have to work afterwards..

the 2 of us walkd around to look for one saloon that we "kan shun yan"... and in the end we picked one.. and guess wad? huishan is inside! lol.. so coincident. after that we went to take some fotos.. hehe.. they are nice and i shall put them here soon!

sick for the past few days.. serious sore throat and cough.. then some more go stand in the sun.. nearly fainted ar haha.. take medicine+no rest+stand in the sun=faint. this formular definatly works. and worse of all i passe it to minzhen.. aiyo... guilty.. haha... btw, last night i ate a rice dumpling jus before i slept at 2... super duper guilty!!! haha.. but the delicious dumpling.. its worth it.. lolz...

Adaption from mao mao bloggie:...

"Ok i'm back... at least i didnt take a month to publish another post.. so you people out there (esp Sammy) who keeps complaining about my inconsistency of blogging can kiss my ***** ***... ha ha ha.. aniwae back to the topic.. i'm here juz to shit out anything thats in my mind now.. let me start..

To: Kelvin Kho

We've argued lots of times since the start of the new semester because you always said that i've neglected our frenship and u aint happy with it.. kinda sorry about it coz i was busy with some stuff wenever u asked me out or something.. and it pissed me off that u misunderstood me sayin i have 'new friends'.. i mean come on.. having new friends doesnt mean i've forgotten about old friends.. and it wasnt becoz of that in the first place that we did not talk much.. i was busy man.. Sory about that.. but thats all in the past.. glad we've thrashed things out.. hope everything is fine now between us.. yea.. btw i know you're sick, takecare of yourself.. anything just give me a call.. peace man.."

frankly when jess ask me come see i am touched... cos now i noe there is effort for the friendship... :)

happy birthday jess!

ひらがな
あいうえお
かきくけこ
さしすせそ
たちつてと
なにぬねの
はひふへほ
まみむめも
や　ゆ　よ
らりるれろ
わ　　　を
ん

カタカナ
アイウエオ
カキクケコ
サシスセソ
タチツテト
ナニヌネノ
ハヒフヘホ
マミムメモ
ヤ　ユ　ヨ
ラリルレロ
ワ　　　ヲ
ン


ありがとお　がざいます。

ronald you are so like me! total same situation when i was in yr 1!!!

below is an excrept from ronald's bloggie:

"anyway, school is still ok... i found out that i had plenty of friends. more than before that is.. BUT... i do not have any really close friends.. not like those in my secondary life.. i seem like a group hopper.. i can join practically any group of friends. however, its not very nice. i hav to withstand scorns and backstebbing of this partically group im with five mins earlier and to try say good things about that group im in juz now and try make peace among the group im with five mins later. if u get what i meant. in the end, i knew so much more about the thoughts and going ons about the class.

being the middle man is surely a tough job.

and i dun like it at all..."


thats what is in my heart too then.. thou now sometimes it still comes back.. its much better now.. and i feel so lucky.. and u will too ronald!

Finally! yesterday i went to watch star wars episode 3.. all the way couldnt find anyone to go with me.. but luckily there is Jing fa and Weihao who wants to watch too.. so the 3 of us jio to go.. and last minute changda decides to go too.. great! the more the merrier.. so off we went to causeway point right after school and got the tix and kfc meals. well, the shows is good.. company is good too.. but quite wasted that there is no activities after that.. cos jingfa got training for competition and weihao gotta work. its like a long long time i have not bonded with anyone in the class.. at least i havent even went out with them once yet. back to the show, luckily i did managed to catch the other shows.. other wise i will be like ??? and asking a lot of questions to irritate jingfa and weihao.. lol.. but its really nice for the guys to go out once in the while to jalan jalan.. looking forward to the next one!

sian la.. finished jap lesson and still waiting for ict.. got a very very serious sore throat and now even eating and talking hurts.. EATING AND TALKING!!! how do i live without the 2 of you!!! omg... jus got to bear with it for the time being.

had just submitted my entry for the "edit the apple" competition held by genious sammy.. was too free and got nothing to do! i think i am going to get an ice cream or some cold dessert.. throat is burning!

worried is the only word to describe myself now.

wad is really happening.. seeing u distracted the whole day.. discouraged.. sad.. and nothing i can do to help you.. i saw the smiles on your faces.. but i noe deep inside they are jus fake.. you are trying to make us less worry.. zhen zuo qi lai ok!! i will be waiting for the old cherry you to be back soon..

arh!! and i jus found out that finance ica 2 due next week.. shits... sigh.. must buck up lah...

went to book my basic theory today also.. haha.. was like so lazy duh~ jenn birthday april oso pass liao.. sigh.. too lazy me.. must jia you lor hahaz..

looking forward to la kopi with weihao this weekend..

Your Birthdate: January 20

Your birth on the 20th day of the month adds a degree of emotion, sensitivity, and intuition to your reading. The 2 energy provided here is very social, allowing you to make friends easily and quickly. Yet you are apt to have a rather nervous air in the company of a large group. You have a warmhearted nature and emotional understanding that constantly seeks affection. You are very prone to become depressed and moody, as emotions can turn inward and cause anxiety and mental turmoil. It can be hard for you to bounce back to reality when depression sets in. When things are going well, you can go just as far the other way and become extremely affectionate.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

sianz la.. now in ICT.. JX cut his hair!!!!! haha.. so short.. reminds me of my younger days.. where my hair is as short.. but dun worry.. its nice.. it is..

and also this guy is lost in sengkang on sat nite! its like past 12 and i got his call.. desperately calling for help! haha.. but too bad i am outside can help a much.. jus managed to bring him to the destination by fone.. lol.. so in the end he got home lor.. haha.. din noe i noe my place so well.. haha..

i think i am considered lucky or just pure suay?

heard from some seniors that they have not seen the priciple b4.. not director, but principle.. the big shot!!

and today i saw him.. twice some more! when i was in the lift, i was called for not wearing landyard in the lift.. stooopid rite! who is going to check out your admin card in the lift!!!!

then after that, i went to the lab.. and as usual my sweet tooth came and i have to go to the arcade for some yummy.. and guess what? the idiot came to the arcade and i am scolded for the second time! and i din bring admin with me.. left in bag.. so have to like siam here and there..

actually oso not principal catch.. is director.. i think they just wana put up something nice for credits.. please lor.. sbm is the most stingy one.. buay ta han..

ooh.. today i went to corpthorne orchid hotel for buffet.. my aunt's treat.. haha.. food there not so bad la.. but also nothing much special.. so.. after that went to town with ann.. while waiting to meet with mabel we walked around and i went to meet huishan. then ann went back and i meet up with mabel. ate and shopped around. and i bought a pair of boardshort from foxx man, FINALLY! haha.. was like wantin to buy for so long liao and today finally saw it.. offer item cost only 19 lor! hehe... aniwaes.. i will update again..

now in free access.. jus "accidentally" saw the sms in ur fone and i think there is a lot of things i din noe. call me tonite to tell me more k.. haha dun later say drift apart.. I AM HAPPY!!!! (as requested by herry) wahlao mao*2 i tell u everything u lidat treat me.. sux la u.. wad brudders... haha...

haha.. sometimes i think junxiong's blog got alot of wonderful entries that is realli worth the time to read.. jus wana let ya noe they are great.. and that its not rubbish.. dun listen to those who duno how to appreciate.. haha.. now in lab le getting ready for ICT presentation.. cya!

give me back the life that i deserve! i dont want those stupid resposibilities that i shouldnt be bearing. why cant i be just any other teens of my age?

ok.. now in e plaza doing MM and ICT exam at the same time.. and CANDISE next to me.. *(haha now i mentioned u in my blog liao rites?) was slacking for a moment.. but these few days havent been so good.. in fact the past weeeks havent been good.. sigh.. gary jioed me to seoul garden.. haha.. he's rite.. yrs since we last went.. remember those sec sch days where that is our fav hang out.. when ever there is event and we release sch early... its a sure to go there.. then after that we got the discount card its even more crazy.. it has been a place that i am attached to cos its all our memories.. i can say gary is the one that realli noes me. life is actually not a waste to have wonderful family and also a friend. a true one. even now we were no longer classmates and neighbour i think the friendship is stronger.. must go on k! lolz.. must dedicate to him this post.. haha..

a meaningful post..

.:. On earth... .:.
Earth seems to be a interesting planet.
A planet with living beings on it.
Place with feelings around wherever you go.
Don't look down on feelings.
Cause thats the biggest weapon to overcome anything.
Anger, Courage, Love, Hatred, Confident, Sad, Joyous
These are the feelings of us.
Living beings on this planet.
You use different feeling for different area in your life.
But many neglect the positive feelings.
They rather choose the negative feelings.
Which makes me think.
Thinking on the feelings i use..
i think, thinking of many scenes in my memories.
Memories can't be brought back.
It lives in me always.
Always in me, That me, staying on earth...

courtesy of cjx's blog.

last night was like crazy lor! thunder storm.. lightning non stop.. lightning until very scary.. can see the lightning really "strike across the sky" literally. then somemore i still sleeping in my mum's room and my face is facing the window! aiyo.. for a moment i tot the end is coming.. but luckily i am still here.. ahaha.. crazy me saying crazy thing.. cya..

my oh my.. yest there is a grouping for another module.. and as usual i am excluded.. sigh.. it breaks my heart when i see my friends realli forget me..

i cant help but keep thinking, is it reali my fault and all thesE? wad haf i done that they have to do this to me? the second time their project doesnt includes me, i am realli shattered.

someone's hp also no longer our foto le.. last time its always 3 of us.. now its 2 of u and someone else.. y did things turned out to be like this? am i really out le? i noe now u all have ur own gang le.. i feel like a "outsider".. y!?

but today "he" offered me a sweet! haha.. happy like hell only.. hope things will go better ba.. *dream*

aiya.. i lost my hp accessory.. the "crow".. someone pulled it off while i am walking and now only the hook is there.. our bad boy accessory also pulled off.. who the hell did that i don't know.. but now i just noe that the lasts of my common identity with "them" is now gone. no more crow.. no more bad boys.. even their biz law group does not includes me.. sigh.. maybe angi is right.. i shouldnt have taken so many photos with them with me in the middle.. its suppose to be inauspicious and the middle guy will break off with the other two friends.. sigh... hope its not true k..

i cant help but feel i am a failure in all my friendships in the class.. well.. like someone once said, u can be a good classmate but necessary a good friend. maybe i am not well enough for them.. maybe i am not good enough for you!

"i didnt say hate coz at least theres Kang an n Junxiong in the klass.. the reason bein most of them are so cheeeeeennaaaaaa... talkin in chinese 24/7.. but at least i met new good frens like Jess and QQ.. yea.. and wat happen to u KELVIN KHO... even u've joined em.. "

Wow. its my fault again. :)

How Many Friends?
The old man turned to me and asked
"How many friends have you?"
Why 10 or 20 friends have I,
And named off just a few...He
rose quite slow with effort
And sadly shook his head"A lucky child you are
To have so many friends," he said
But think of what you're saying
There is so much you do not know
A friend is just not someone
To whom you say "Hello"
A friends a tender shoulder
On which to softly cry
A well to pour your troubles down
And raise your spirits high
A friend is a hand to pull you up
From darkness and despair...
When all your other "so called" friends
Have helped to put you there
A true friend is an ally
Who can't be moved or bought
A voice to keep your name alive
When others have forgot
But most of all a friend is a heart
A strong and sturdy wall
For from the hearts of friends
There comes the greatest love of all!!!
So think of what I've spoken
For every word is true
And answer once again my child
How many friends have you???

as seen on jun xiong's bloggie..

how many friends have i?

so long no talk to xiong le.. last nite i called him.. had a nice long talk.. and finally i can talk to someone who understands me.. and finally someone can listen to what i wana say..

wo shi lian le.. hai shi ta cong lai dou mei you kai shi guo?

i dont know.. maybe u can give me the answer?

George Benson - Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You

If I had to life without you near me
The days would all be empty
The nights would seem so long
With you I see forever oh so early
I might have been in love before
But it never felt this strong
Our dreams are young and we both know
They'll take us where we want to go
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live without you

[Chorus]
Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You oughta know by now how much I love you
One thing you can be sure of
I'll never ask for more than your love
Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You oughta know by now how much I love you
The world may change my whole life through
But nothing's gonna change my love for you

If the road ahead is not so easy
Our love will lead the way for us
Like a guiding star
I'll be there for you if you should need me
You don't have to change a thing
I love you just the way you are
So come with me and share the view
I'll help you see forever too
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live without you

its our song.. and it will always be..

if u dun talk to me, how am i suppose to know wad u r thinking?

if i dun noe wad u r thinging, how am i suppose to give u good advice?

i noe that by not being able to give u good advices on life and friends, i am not included as your friend.. wo men bu shi shen me dou shuo de hao peng you ma?

i noe i am not the one that can always b by ur side to lend a helping ear..

i kept asking myself why arent i the one u wud approach when u felt troubled?

i failed thoroughly as a friend...

ooh.. i am so into japanese drama again! all caused by the show now on tv.. Good Luck!

its such a nice show.. all about pursuing dreams, friendship, love, kinship etc.

its definately a show worth my time.

anyway, it helps, as i am learning jaapanese now.. lolx...

da best jap show ever watched!!

wao! i think the last time i blog is 40 days ago! i din even notice!! wah paiseh paiseh..

well.. alot things happen in this shrot period.. had my second exam. then bbq for the class.. got result last week.. happy that i passed all.. BM0411 into history.. that little bit of sadness has been making me feel very uncomfortable.. and my new class is BM0431. should i say i look forward to it? i dun no..

i also when to guangzhou in china! for a exhibition there.. helping my dad at his workplace.. and the things there are damned cheap. i even permed my hair there for only 9 bucks! but the effect.. err.. sigh.. lets change topic.. T_T

school starting next week.. pretty looking forward to it! hope it will turn out to b a nicer class.. thou alot pple still from 0411.. lolx..

some pictures from our last presentation.. so sad.. :`(




Taida, Joko, KK and Dilys..



With Diyana and Herry..




With Herry, Junxiong, Sam, Di and Joan..



Me and Sam.. d "Look Alike" brothers.. which he finds so unfortunate.. haha..



Junxiong! Brothers forever!

A promise made is a promised made.

no matter where you go or run, you can never erase the memory of another.

Another who listened and hold your promise to death.

sounds familiar doesnt it?

up to today,

i lost all faith i have in those i trusted

so little i have with me.

but i still lose it finally

i dun blame

cos you have your reasons.

valid reasons.


i am just disappointed in myself.


friends forever ok? u noe i treasure u as a buddy.

hope that this isnt an empty promise made.

i dun want you all to misunderstand me.

walking away doesnt mean i am petty. i jus dun want to quarrel with u all over trival matters.

mood swings.. afraid i wud harm the friendship when we quarrel so i jus walk away for a small cool down session..

sigh.

people come in and out of our lives.. sometimes, the time we spend together is short-lived. but the feeling will always be in our hearts rite? i hate it when my friends are leaving.. i hate the feeling.. the one that u feel when u see their back.. slowly diminishing.. slowly fading off, out of ur sight. its not that we are not going to meet anymre, but we just couldnt see each other that often. no more jokes, no more pple to share happiness and woes, no more foto taking.. arent these all the good memories that we share?

hope they will always stay in my heart.. ur heart.. everyone's heart..

take care my dear fren, i will still be here for u!

Yesterday was so great too! went to chinatown to catch the fire crackers with mabel and goerge.. met at 4.30 to eat at mac at lucky china town and then start to q at 5! the fire crackers only start at 7.30.. so we had to entertain ourselves with jokes and nonsenses.. to the extend that the auntie behind us is laughing at us! haha.. then came the grand fire crackers which is so awesome.. i think the long wait is worth. then after that george have to go home and me and mabel walk ard and eat supper while waiting for the nex round at 9.30.. but after some walking we are tired so we proceed back to the place at abt 8.30 but by the time we reach there the firecrackers is half way thru!!! stupid news paper for the wrong info.. haha.. but anw, it was realli an enjoyable nite and i enjoyed throughly! thanks for the tee and wallet mabel and goerge! love them!

Wooo~ 2.29 am nw.. i am damnnnn hapi today!!! many of my most wonderful friends came to my house to celebrate my birthday! after econs tut today i mit up with gary and we came over to my house after picking up grandma. and guess wad.. he drew a sketch for me! i was so super touched! haha.. well i can say this buddy isnt for nothing.. after reaching then he slept for abt 1+ hr before jenn and chelle arrive.. i am so happy to see them!! haha well this 3 of them is my bestest friend of ma life.. never regretted this life noeing them! then we jus eat and eat and eat.. for abt 3 rounds i think.. haha.. ate super lots.. then gary ate bout 2 rounds and then huishan came.. gillian was late at about 8 but i am so happy that she is here too... :) after which is the mahjong and foto taking sessions, which was super fun!!! took super lots of foto and all.. i duno y but i jus love it.. there is this one featuring me and jenn and chelle.. and chelle describe as do-re-mi.. haha.. cool... gotta have it on my desk.. and sis's friends was here too.. i just wana say a very big thank you to all of you guys who r present.. it is really a very memorable day for me and i think it will stay in my heart!!! and also appreciates all ur presents they are simply great!! thanks ya all!!

HA HA! I didn't noe i am sooo petty! I didn't noe i am so unreasonable! I didn't noe i am so anti social! i am tooo tired to explain to u all anymore.. after all these time i tot u all noe me, but appearently u all dun. if you all wana continue to think i am that petty kind, then i got nothing to say! after all, i think i had done my part to try to maintain all the friendships.

9 days.. just 9 more days!

Yummy! now i noe one more place for nice food! had buffet high tea at lion city hotel today.. and the food isnt so bad! and furthermore, the price is affordable.. so no harm trying!

haha today i went to courseway point with my dear dear nephew and cousins.. haha.. been training my nephew to call me kor kor instead of uncle.. dun wana b so old!!! haha.. then ate and buy things lor.. had quite some fun! havent been to here before.. haha if i knew i wud have brought my passport so we can go malaysia!

Happy New Yr!!! haha.. a new yr has came.. time for some resolutions! first, have to be puntual for all outings, be it project or all nonsense! haha.. then have to grow taller, darker, nicer body.. (haha this part more or less same as jun xiong..)