4 more day.

should i look forward to it?

dun think so.. the atmosphere is not there..

sigh.. today was too hungry and went on lunch abit earlier and came back a bit late cos south canteen is too far.. and then miss chia found out.. second time liao and i am so worried its gonna affect my grades. hope it will not please please!! please pity 2 hungry man.. we are just desperately hungry...

sigh. sometimes jus feel like a loser.. be it with friendship.. studies.. anything..

may not be always.. but quite often..

studies wise.. its wad i need to do right now but sometimes just cant seems to get it done right.

friends.. sigh.. i dunno y.. i think i am losing alot of them... mybe sometimes its due to some small small incident.. but i dunno y.. it jus makes me feel like u all are not taking me as a fren at all.. issit cos i am too sensitive? or am i too petty? or its just plainly.. i am just asking too much from them.. as a fren..

ms cai is quite right.. people changes.. maybe its just me who cant take the fact ba.. ggrrhh.. noe i shd get over it for more important things in my life.. but they are just too dear to me.. friends are not easy to make.. and they were once my very dear buddy... y??? y must it b "once"?

***

been raining since last sat.. almost like whole day rain.. for sat and sun its really whole day like it has never rained before... then monday finally got a bit sunlight to make myself less mouldy.. but its gone by noon.. and after that the pouring continues.. yest and today is slightly better.. got sunlight here and there.. but right now its pouring like dunno wad outside da window~! (11-1-06 2250hrs)

O.M.G.

i can'e believe what i have heard. is singaporeans too fcuking fortunate and safe or what?

"so troublesome"

"waste my time"

reportedly what some people said when there is and emergency excercise this morn.

how do you know when there will be a bonb or what? still say government didn't warn and make the people prepared.. hello you noe wad is an EMERGENCY not? if can prepare then its not emergency liao lor! its a good chance to see if you are prepared for this kind of situation or not and all you say is this? and some even says it shouldn't be conducted at the morning when people is rushing.

excuse me, u think terrorist stupid one ar? of cos they will choose the peak period when there is alot of people rite? please use some COMMON SENSE... or borrow from someone common if you think you are too extraordinary to have... wahlau! i can't believe this is the kind of attitude some singaporeans have!!

maybe its high time singapore tries to enhance the social studies or what ever subjects that teaches people this moral... otherwise one day maybe there is a real bomb and the siren is sounded at the bus interchange, u will still hear some stupid fools complaining how troublesome it is.. luckily i am not there.. otherwise i going to say yong hui's favourite phrase.. "you want me slap you ar?"

****

anw.. this two days has been super hibernating period! luckily its weekend.. has been raining nonstop since last evening (sat).. now then jus stop for a while.. i think i spent about 70% of my time to day on my comfy bed in the blanket. and 60% of that 70% i am sleeping.. whoo~ long time hasnt had such good life liao.. rain rain i love you.. muahaha.. but tml is going to be bad lor cos nyp being the "low land" area is definately going to have many flooding places.. and IM being at level one inevitably will have some floods here there to at the corridoors.... haha.. play with water!

FIVE GOOD THINGS THAT HAPPENED IN 2005
-I bought my phone (Yay! Dream fone yea!)
-I entered ARDC, I made fab friends.

-Plenty plenty of new clothes entered my room.
-Overseas trips
-Learnt some true faces of some people...

FIVE BAD THINGS THAT HAPPENED IN 2005
-I met jerk-like, byatch-like people. In summary, just some bad people.
-I brought my phone (it keeps spoiling.. irritating...)
-etc etc...

---(and in comparison, my good overrode my bad. So my year didn't go as bad as I thought yea.)

***

anw.. the past weekend was a great one! sat was NYE and I was at my cousin's house in the evening for some event that is organised by the RC.. the food is kinda nice.. lol... after that in the night I went out for some events with friends for the first time during a holiday! went to meet minzhen, lijuan, weihao and some others at clark quey there.. at first cant make it de.. but since minzhen and juan is going.. I tried to squeeze time.. then played monopoly lor.. me and juan and zhen tag team.. haha.. and we came in second... after that later in the night I meet up with jessica and yong hui to catch the marvelous fire works!! omg.. so fcuking nice... the whole shoreline is lighted by the fireworks can you imagine!!! and its a good 10 min! even better than the ndp ones... then hor we started to wallk walk around... before the 3 of ur headed to my home and ton.. haha.. ate bee hoon soup and we had our fav ribena.. a very bonding session for the 3 of us.. too bad cheryl cant be here... haa.. had a very fun night..

then on sun went to my grandmothers house lor as usual.. but this time while accompanying my grandma for mahjong i won near to $16!!! achievement sia.. haha.. then yest i went to parkway.. the gaint supermarket.. shop for cny mah.. better to start early.. so that there will be more time to prepare.. can u imagine how enthu i am waiting for cny to come i think i can faster go wash the new clothes i got.. and iron then slowly.. if i cramp till last minute i sure die.. haha... at parkway also saw ah loy.. lol.. coincident hor... at the count down i also saw jia chun, a old time secondary school buddy! he has sharp eyes to recognise me in so many people!! haha..

last day of the year 2005.. looking back at it.. its rather "fruitful"..

learnt alot..

learnt how to work with people.. (like them or not u have to..)

learn how not to ask too much from ur "friends".. (still doubting the real defination of friends)

learn how to tolerate the fugly faces of some (otherwise how to work with them?)

learn how to take things easier.. (it'll give u a hell outta ur life if u dun..)

learn how to do researches.. rcp-in.. issue out..

a lot more ba.. too many to be listed here.. all the best for the upcoming year..!

******************

you all a team.. a real team..
you all did things that i could never get u all to do..
but now without me, you all did all that.
we had fun, we had joy, but will they be back?

maybe i am getting further and further.. and further...

woo~ last working day in 2005.. so fast one more year has passed... still remember having some resolutions at year start but few has been fulfilled.. so i shall combine the undone ones with the new one for the next year. lol.

anw, has been a not bad week at IM. so, shall enjoy while i still can!

2 more days then january liao.. haha.. hope the new year will be a better one!

a nice song i wanna share...

**
Lost Good Things 童话破灭
who love my downfall

and it's just too cold

you show me true friend

baby i was so so

you might as well call me up physically

you know, you got me only into extremes

and i can't believe it

and don't know what to think

sometime around it was so love-sick

now it's so sick

cause they ain't doubt love

your hint is apart

and the day between us wasn't enough

and i know

i feel good time's come

i thought they stay, things are done

and become word-made

angels came but they left you day

had you slip awaylisten now burning empty

still this can't bebut even now we're not that happy

hotel motel it's hot in hell free from myself

but now left with no home

i want you to knowi never would have all

figure out that when you came now

it could have been forever

now it does bring me down

the high now the low up and down we go

put myself too close got burnt night tones

it feels like i'm sinking in the dead sea

don't we care the space inside us so empty

it's like it's over before be gone

this song is over now so was i want

ho ho ho.. merry christmas! this years christmas is kinda special cos its the first time i really celebrated it with friends... yesterday we went to lauren''s house! had fun but i was being bullied.. >.< lauren say i am not a guy. but sister to them... arrghh.. sigh. but the event is a great one! thanks evonne for organising.. and lauren for the venue.. kelvin, evonne, lauren, lip tat, serene, ser ser, debbie, shaune, eileen, maz, weihao was there at the great bonding session with plenty of food and games and vcd.. woohoo~!

after that we left at around evening and i headed down to my aunt's house for the family bbq every yr. great event nice food and alot of talking. then the presents also very nice.. hehe..

anw.. for the past week.. its alot of happenings in school.. once again i learnt how to work with peoples i dun like.. its really has been a learning journey here at tep. of cos other than this also learnt alot other things la haha. all i can say is team work and cooperation is important.. =) and i am glad that the groups o have been working with has been always quite bonded! like my ardc sicc team (ser ser, maz, jian an, jean), festive helpers (cheryl, yong hui, jessica, ms cai), finance (hasanah, cindy) everyone has been very kind to me even when there are times i made mistakes.. thanks for everything!

sigh. leopard just doesnt change it's spots.

today i heard it again. its THAT tone. that very tone.

obviously u think i wont be hearing it when we are at different place, but it so happened i heard it today ha. sorry HOR!

chey.. can't believe you are actually this thick skinned... but anw, its none of my business... i just purely hate it when two fones ring to the same melody.. and the melody is the fruit of my hard work. THANKS so much hor for fcuking up my day... muahahaha...

*~ don't step on my tail... you'll regret.. i wun even care who the fucking hell big shot you are or how rich you are.

january coming soon.. its always a month i always look forward too..

cos...







chinese new year is coming!!!

haa... cos got new clothes. got hong baos, got to see relatives whom i only see once a year..

alot of catching ups to do.. and its also nice to know every one is still well.. hee..

so that's it!

arr!! dunno why i always cant tag at my own board.. want to reply to my friend's notes also cant.. sigh.. shall do it here..

kk-evonne:
yea! we will rock lauren's house on 24 dec!!

kk-xuehui:
haha.. i also got the idea from serene's blog.. lol.. must call her shi fu..

kk-zb,kl,deb:
hello miss you all too remember the lunch gathering we have!!!

some of the farewell party fotos! hehe i TRIED to make them more funny.. but if it is not please tell me in my tag so nex time i dun do them.. haha

for a long time, i find that my classmates already dun care about my feelings liao... but after i came to ardc, i discovered that some of them still does..like ser ser.. still scared that i am angry.. i am so touched leh!! and kl, zb, and the rest of you.. you guys really made me forget about the other heartless ones.. haha.. cheers!

anw, now the heart charity is on. dunno why but nowadays i no longer like this kinda shows. first, i am utterly disgusted by the "very popular group in asia, world's heavenly group" that came to perform. excuse me lor please dont come out into the industry to play if you cant even sing live for a charity show. and its not the first time. dun really know how come so many fans support them. and it also makes me wonder whether the fans are fake ones, paid by the records company or their manager mr sun. *so happy ser ser shares the same thinking*

then the next segment that makes me wants to change channel is the segment on the muscle mans. dunno why mediacorp keep on putting this kinda performance despite so many in the public has find it so disturbing. issit got some physco people willing to pay u all alot to do it? siao ar. this time clip heavy things to their tigh and arms to lift heavy things. wahlao makes me want to puke. as if the artisists not human issit.. sigh.. think the needy also kek sim after they see ar...

tml, its going to be the start at IM, dun look forward to it. but life still has to go on.. like wads on ser ser's nick, I miss ARDC, but it's the time to say goodbye... everything in this world will go to an end.. even the nicest thing. but wads important is we cherish the good things that came out of it. to me, its the friends i made there and the happy memories i got.. i will keep them with me.. so cheers!

today its training for the new stop. i am so disappointed.. so sad.. everything feels so meaningless.. i will be far away from the others.. the trainings wasted alot of times waiting cos they are very busy.. so we jus wasted alot of time and finalli i finished my "san ge hao ren" with deb and serene. the briefing at LT is just as long winded and not interesting lor.. i dun understand why they noe no one is listening and still want to make it so long.. bout 2 hours hor.. then starving.. and also very cold.. like i say overall is just pure disappointment la so i shall not mention more liao..

14 dec. the very last day at ardc.

tml, i will be reporting to the ops instead of mr lee.

no more ma guo ren. no more lu ren. no more xin ren min.

no more puzzle fighter. no more crazy taxi with serene, debbie, zibin, kailing.

no more ardc foto taking.

no more shaker fries with evonne.



everything now seems so colourless to me...

i remembered a song by eason which suddenly i feel can represent the festive season now and my feeling. the lyrics is in chinese and must encode to unicode to see..


圣诞节
词:何启弘 曲:李峻一

我住的城巿从不下雪
记忆却堆满冷的感觉
思念的旺季霓虹扫过喧哗的街
把快乐赶得好远

*落单的恋人最怕过节
只能独自庆祝尽量喝醉
我爱过的人没有一个留在身边
寂寞它陪我过夜

#Merry Merry Christmas Lonely Lonely Christmas
想祝福不知该给谁
爱被我们打了死结

Lonely Lonely Christmas Merry Merry Christmas
写了卡片能寄给谁
心碎的像街上的纸屑

Repeat *
# 电话不接不要被人
发现我整夜都关在房间
狂欢的笑声听来像哀悼的音乐
眼眶的泪 温热冻结
望着电视里的无聊节目
瘫在沙发上变成没知觉的植物

Repeat #
#谁来陪我过这圣诞节

i think.. i am very brave.. cos...

i went to donate blood!! cant imagine how bloody scared and nervous i am k. since young i had phobia of needles and blood.. but this time lay yin gave me alot of courage and i went with her... woohoo~ three cheers for kelvin!!

i will upload the foto another time. dunno y sudden cant upload.. haha

yesterday, i discovered a very fun game. thou a bit late. haha.. crazy taxi..

this is my first score.

my best score so far.

serene's score.

thursday. day 4 of block leave. so sian.

nth much to do at home, rather than sleep and see how much fatter i've gotten. rena's friend says TEP got to eat alot and grow tall.. but all i am becoming is tall in the horizontal way.. sigh.. disappointment.

sorta miss ardc. everything in it. going to school with kl in the morn. chatting with mr lee. talking nonsense with ma guo ren and xin ren min. buying breakfast with rena. lunch with zb, jamie, kl and gang. xiu zhen and xue hui's cold joke and singing sessions. disturbing candise with chicken little.

2 more weeks and its going to end. nice times do flies.